Suicide

Suicide jokes

Poison

  • A depressed kid takes a drink of water and someone takes it and takes a drink. "Oh come on, the train stopped, the rope broke, I couldn't get on the building, the gun was empty, the knife was dull, the bridge was too low, and the cliff was nonexistent, and now you took the poison!"

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    Time

  • When someone tells me to kill myself,

    Panic! At The Disco: Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time.

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    Kid

  • A leaf and a depressed kid fall from a building. Which hits the ground first?

    The leaf, the rope stops the depressed kid.

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    Hitler

  • What’s the difference between emos and Hitler?

    Hitler didn’t post on social media when he wanted to kill himself.

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    Brain

  • What do Phillip Adam and Kurt Cobain have in common?

    They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.

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  • Depression

  • What would fall out of a tree first, a depressed person or a feather?

    Answer: The feather wouldn't. The rope would stop the person from falling all the way.

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    Friend

  • My friends were worried that I was making suicide jokes so much, so I said, "Don't worry, you won't have to hear them much longer."

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  • Emo

  • I was walking today and I saw an emo with a noose looking up at a tree. I simply said, "Hang on there, bud!"

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