If you jump off a bridge while crying, it's suicide, but if you jump off a bridge while screaming "parkour," it's a failed stunt.
Suicide Jokes
Noose: "Hey man, wanna hang out?"
Corpse: "Sorry man, I'm dead inside."
If I wanted to kill myself, I would climb to the top of your ego then jump to your IQ.
If you don't like my suicidal jokes, sorry man, didn't know it cut that deep.
I asked to borrow a book from the library. It was titled "Suicide in Ten Easy Steps." The cunt just stood and said, "Cheeky bastard, you won't bring it back!"
I called the suicide hotline, and he suggested I draw on myself to distract myself.
I replied I'd get ink poisoning.
Wouldn't recommend, the police came.
"Trust falling" with a bridge is more trustworthy than me.
An apple and an emo kid fell from a tree, which one hit the ground?
The apple, because the rope caught the emo kid.
Why do emos cut their arms? Because they can't cut the rope.
Why do emos hang themselves? Because no one wants to hang around them.
what do you call a suicide bomber that loves water? a bath bomb.
What's worse than a failed suicide, you ask?
I fail suicide because you forgot to do the dishes and your parents come after you and they're the ones to kill you, not yourself.
Rope: Hey buddy! Want to hang?
Me: Maybe I can hang later...
Cock: Can I have attention from your Dad now?
I'm not suicidal, I'm just speedrunning life.
A leaf and an emo are both falling from a tree.
Which one hits the ground first?
The leaf, the emo got caught by a rope.
What makes a depressed kid happy? ..... A bridge.
What did the rope and the tree say to the kid?
Do you want to hang later?
A noose, a knife, a gun, and a razor blade look at a child who committed suicide after being bullied.
Everyone looked at the noose. The noose would say, "What? It wasn't my fault!"
If I don't get a bf by the end of this month, Christmas lights won't be the only thing hanging from the roof.
What do you call a group of Emo kids?
Suicide Squad.
What jumps and never let's go?
An Emo kid.
I bet all Emos want to be like their biggest influencers some day.
Dead.
Why do Emos want to be the "Scene" these days?
The only thing I've "Scene" from them is their suicide rate climbing, it's starting to climb quicker than they did to get to the top of whatever they jumped off.
