Suck jokes
I love sucking on food because if you really think about it, tits can be counted as food, so I could technically suck on a woman's tits.
What's the difference between a female NCO and a zebra?
A zebra didn't have to suck and fuck to get its stripes.
As an older brother, I always gave my little sister advice. I always said to do your best and never quit. So one day I went to her room. I see my sister giving married men blow jobs.
I ask what are you doing? The married men said she is giving us blow jobs because our wives don't do it. My sister said you told me to do your best, and my best is to suck them dry. As a brother, I couldn't be more prouder.
Ernie and Burt were camping in the woods, when they woke up Burt asked Ernie "how did you sleep?" Ernie replied with "I slept amazing! I had a great dream that I was in a magic candy world and was sucking the most tastiest lollipop I'd ever tasted in my life."
Burt replied with "Good to hear, I slept amazing too. I had a dream that I was in heaven surrounded by angels, and one of them was giving me a blow job."
Why do dwarfs suck a cow's udder instead of being breastfed? Because they are too short.
I hate it when people say to suck it up... I mean, sometimes I don’t want someone’s dick in my face.
Suck all the bread!
Rape victims suck, literally.
I like sucking the Twin Towers off, but then I forgot dad already finished the job.
Why did the cheetah get sad?
'Cause it didn't have any balls to suck.
I accidentally sucked my own ball sack.
I saw my sister sucking a big toe.
What's got 9 arms and sucks?
Def Leppard.
Why do all of Oliver Anthony's songs sound like "shit"?
Answer: Because he sucks!
These Afghanistan people suck at Jenga.
Q: What do a blond girl and a tornado have in common? A: There's a lot of blowing and sucking, then you lose your house.
Me: What is the difference between your mom and a mosquito?
Friend: Let me guess, they both suck you.
What can a gay man with a physical disability do better than a heterosexual woman that doesn't have a physical disability?
Suck a big cock.
Morbius was awesome, and the Batman sucked.
Why did the NBA remove the glory hole from the men's locker room?
Too many black basketball players sucking too many white cocks before the game.