Two blondes fall down a well. One says to the other one, “Isn’t it dark down here?” She replies, “I don’t know. I can’t see.”

How does Moses prepare his tea? – Hebrews it.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Why can’t blind people eat fish?

Because it’s sea food.

What’s the best thing about 28 year old’s? -There’s 20 of them.

Why was the man fired from a calendar factory? – He took a day off.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? – A stick.

How does NASA organize a party? – They planet.

What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? – “Bison.”

What’s red and bad for your teeth? – A brick.

Two antennas got married on a roof. The ceremony was horrible but the reception was great!

Why don’t you ever see hippos hiding in trees? – Because they are really good at it.

What’s the cheapest kind of meat you can buy?

Deer balls. They’re under a buck.

I know a woman who owns a taser. – She’s stunning!

What’s the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? – The wheelchair.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? – Just Juan.

What’s a Mexican’s favorite sport?

Cross country.

Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? - Of course. The Empire State Building can’t jump.

What do friends and trees have in common? They both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

Why can’t college students take exams at the zoo? – Too many cheetahs!