Stupid jokes
Why do I have to do the stupid joke, mum?
Yo mama so stupid that she had an appointment with Dr. Pepper.
Why do people poop?
Because it we need to!
Why am I so fat? When I was younger my mother said I should be the bigger person.
Me having a good day. Going on a walk on a peaceful day.
My depression: hey, what's up!
Me: go away.
My depression: well how rude.
Me: 🙄.
My depression: remember that one time......
Me: no, don't even.
My depression: that we.....
Me: nope.
My depression: *says really fast*: said that one stupid joke that wasn't funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilled water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like you do every single night.
Me: 😳😶😟.
My depression: 😉 don't worry I'll always be here for you.
What is red and shaped like a bucket?
A red bucket.
Why did the football coach go to the bank?
To get his quarterback!
What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.
An unfortunate accident happened at the Nestlè factory. A man named Joe was seriously injured because a box of chocolates fell on him. Every time he said, "The chocolates are on me!" everyone cheered.
What's blue and doesn't weigh much?
Light blue.
I feel bad for shopping carts. They're always being pushed around.
I recently got kicked out of a casino because I apparently misunderstood what the craps table was for.
Q: Knock, knock? Who’s there? A: Boo. A: Boo who? Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
What's Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination?
HAAAAAANNNNDDDDEEEEEEYYYYEEEEEE!
Whenever you think back to 9/11 and realize there are 12 hours in front of us, why the f*ck didn't they warn us?
I love your mom and dad's joke! They made it together and called it your name.
Want to hear a joke? I swear it isn't about my life again.
My mom and dad made a joke together and called it "yeetsu" (me)!
Stupid joke about Stephen Hawking that wasn't funny the first fucking time.
How do you leave an idiot in suspense? I'll tell you tomorrow!
Asian without "As" is just sin.