Student jokes

Me on my way to the principal's office after the trans kid told me to act my age, so I told him to act his gender.

What do you call Greg in your class? Obese.

One of the students reported a school shooting.

That fucking snitch...

Q: What do you call a skeleton that goes to school but doesn't do any work?

A: Lazy bones.

Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?

So he could get into high school.

Ms. Smith: Johnny, when I was a little girl, I was told if I made ugly faces, it would freeze, and I would stay like that.

Little Johnny: Well, Ms. Smith, you can't say you weren't warned.

What did the angler say to his students at the end of his fishing class?

Catch you later!

Student: Why does everyone hate me?

Another student: Because U got the A last night.

New teacher: Everyone stand up if you think you are stupid.

Student: Stands up.

Teacher: Why did you stand up?

Student: I hate seeing you stand up there by yourself.

Teacher's pen is RED, our pen is BLUE, she is marking an EGG on my marksheet, left with questions and no CLUE.

Do you know what the hardest part of school is?

Student: It's hot in here.

Teacher: That's because I'm in here.

I was sitting in class, and the teacher said he wasn't disappointed in me and my best friend, but not so much in me.

I looked at my best friend and said, "I'm a disappointment to the teacher, too."

I got in trouble in school today. The teacher said, "I'm gonna call your parents!"

I said, "Let me know when you find them." <3

Seeing so many balding college students is so sad. Like, why the fuck is your hairline graduating before you?!?

Teacher: Is anyone's parents missing?

Students: Yeah, yours.

What grade is the worst, like if in elementary?

Teacher told me to turn in my essay, but I ain't no snitch, fool.

A student asked a teacher, "How do you pronounce this word? It's spelled A-L-L-I-E-D."

The teacher was about to answer, but then the student said, "Actually, I know how to pronounce it. I lied!" (allied)

There was a fire at my high school when I was in Year 7.

When the local newspaper interviewed my teacher, they asked her how she was seeing the "bright side" of it.

She said, "Well, at least our new students got a warm welcome!"

54 students died that day.