Straight

Straight jokes

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Woman

  • I don't ever really bother women, but when I do, I usually just want to talk. I guess since I just so happened to be a straight male that's not a 10 or a 5, I get shutdown so fast. I put out lit candles...like damn, I thought I hid my ring.

    Flash

  • Why does Ezra Miller’s Flash run in a straight line in The Flash movie? Bro ain’t straight.

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    Bigfoot

  • So, I was walking down the path of my life with Bigfoot, noticing the two pairs of footprints, mine and his.

    One day, I notice his prints are gone. I look up to him and say, "You had promised you would always be there for me. How is this possible?"

    He then looks me straight in the eyes and says, "Raw!"

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    Baseball

  • Few jokes (sorry if they have already been used).

    1 I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

    2 Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he always has a great fall.

    3 Have you heard the one about the skunk? Never mind, it really stinks.

    4 It's always windy in a sports arena. All those fans.

    5 What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!

    6 Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your type here."

    7 What's the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler.

    8 Why were they called the Dark Ages? Because there were lots of knights.

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    Fan

  • Who gets more dick, straight male rap fans or straight male swifties? Answer: Straight male rap fans, because there’s no such thing as a straight male swiftie.

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  • Line

  • Daveon is so straight, he thinks a straight line is the shortest distance between two points and nothing else.

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    Boss

  • You when you face the boss the first time: :)

    You when Dark Souls boss music starts playing on the second phase: :(

    You when you ask why do you hear boss music: <(

    You when the boss goes straight to his final phase after 1 hit:

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    Heart Monitor

  • One day I visited my friend in a hospital.

    I remember when I spoke, "You know, sometimes it's reaching its peak and its lowest state, but I know you'll always end like the others at calming and straight!"

    Yes, I talked about the heart monitor beside him.

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