I love Steven Hawking's stand-up comedy!
Steven Hawking Jokes
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Steven.
Can't you read? It says, "No Hawking."
What does Stephen Hawking put his food in? A microwave.
There is a difference between my brother and Stephen Hawking; at least one of them does something.
In 2011, Stephen Hawking said God didn’t exist.
In 2018, God said Stephen Hawking didn’t exist. xx 😂😂
Have you ever stepped into Steven Hawking's House?
Neither has he.
Stephen Hawking is the fastest footballer ever--he could just charge up the Left Wing!
What's Stephen Hawking's shampoo?
Head and Shoulders. 😊
There's a new horror movie about Stephen Hawking.
It's called "Unplugged!"
Stephen Hawking will be greatly missed for the time he walked this Earth.
For Stephen Hawking, why is being drunk and having his power shut out the same?
He blacks out.
How did Steven Hawkings die?
His wife tripped over his charging plug when he was at 2% battery.
The real reason Steven Hawking died is he was drunk and tried to go down a flight of stairs.
Steven Hawking
What do you call Stephen Hawking when he eats too much?
As fat as Ben Dingley.
Why did Steven Hawking die?
A quad rasher ran him over.
Steven Hawking died. I said, "Why? Did his wheelchair break?"
Steven Hawking lost the Wi-Fi connection on March 14, 2018.
What was Stephen Hawking's pet?
A hawk.
Steven Hawking's Sesh Cave, entry 50p, guaranteed Budweiser and ecstasy. Maybe a gram of heroin. You'll most likely see a mental 90-year-old guy absolutely going mental on the dance floor with a Stella in one hand and another on his crotch.
