Yo mama so poor, the ducks throw bread at her.
So a daughter asks her father "dad what is you opinion on abortions?" So her father says why don't you ask your sister. The daughter responds "but I don't have a sister... Oh"
A guy is at home and he's about to go get a physical at the Doctor's office. When he gets there, the Doctor says, "Brian, you're going to have to stop masturbating." He asked the Doc why? The Doc said, "So I can examine you!"
My mom always said garlic powder makes everything better so i sprinkled some on my divorce papers and my wifes broken leg.
Your so scary that even your hairline ran a way
I'm so proud of my Grandpa. He killed Hitler himself.
I was with my blind friend, and he's telling me "Yeah I can read braille". So I hand him a Lego brick and ask him to read it. Apparently, Lego has been hiding a dark secret from us for years; as all their bricks read "Screw you, asshole"
I threw a Asian down some stairs. It was Wong on so many levels.
Why are orphans so good at tennis?
Because that’s the only love they get
If Uranus is so gross, Why do they take HD photos of it?
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Man looks at his friend and says "if you and a friend go camping and you two get really drunk and in the morning you wake up with a condom in your butt would you tell anyone? " The friend says im a disgusted tone "No" So the man says "ok let's go camping"
Jim’s car is swerving all over the road so a cop pulls him over, “Step out of the car” says the cop, “I am going to need you to take a breathalyzer test.” “I can’t”, Jim responds “You see I have very bad asthma, that can set off an attack.” “Alright,” says the cop, “then you’re going to have to take a blood test.” “Can’t do that either,” Jim responds, “I am a hemophiliac, if a wound is opened, I won’t stop bleeding, and I could bleed to death.” “Ok,” the cop answers “then I will need a urine sample.” “Sorry,” says Jim “I also have diabetes, that could push my sugar count really low.” “Fine, so just come on out, and walk a straight line for me.” “Can’t do that either” responds Jim. “Why not?” Demanded the exasperated cop. “Well, because I’m drunk!”
your mamas so fat, scientists found a new planet called Heranus
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
There are so many things going through my head. Sadly none of it is a 9mm.
Friend: "You are so ugly." Me: "You can't be talking, you give Freddy Krueger nightmares."
So my sister is a feminist I asked her what do you to hear a rape joke she said no I still decided to force one down her throat anyway.
Your forehead so big that the Teachers use it as a whiteboard
I lost at Kahoot so I had to ka-shoot
