SOS jokes

"I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying."

- Charlie Chaplin

Why was the ant so confused? Because all his uncles were ants.

Your mama is so stupid, she bought tickets for Xbox Live.

Why does the Norway navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?

So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.

Yo mama so stupid, she put a ruler under a pillow to see how long she slept.

Why did the orphan like to jump? So they can jump off a bridge to be reunited with their parents.

1 like = 10 more orphans in my basement.

I won the lottery for a million dollars today, so I decided to donate a quarter of it to charity.

I now have $999,999.75.

Friend: Want to play Fall Guys?

Friend 2: Yup.

Friend: Ok, so let me ju- wait, where are you going?

Friend 2: I'm gonna jump off.

Friend: Why?

Friend 2: We are playing Fall Guys, right?

Yo mama so ugly she made happy meals cry.

I got arrested for raping a girl. Its so unfair, i really thought she was dead.

Why is the thief so good at basketball? Because he can shoot, steal, and run.

So there was this kid being bullied by four other kids. I decided to step in.

He didn’t stand a chance against the five of us.

Two brothers play on the street. One of them finds a condom on the ground. Not knowing what it is, they go to their mum and ask what it is that they found. Mum gets mad and yells to throw that away immediately.

Guys go back to the yard, surprised why their mum got mad for just latex. One of them says: "Why did mum get so angry?" The other: "I have no idea, thankfully we did not tell her that we've eaten the yogurt inside!"

Yo mama so fat when she jumped in the water, the whales started singing "We are a family, even though you fatter than me."

Yo mama so ugly when her parents had a gender reveal party the balloon came out green.

"Oh daddy," the kid said. "I love you so much!"

"Hey," the man responded. "Until we get the DNA test results, I'm just Harry to you!"

Why is Santa's sack so big?

Because he only cums once a year.

Roses are red, violets are blue. Your dad is gay, so are you.

I got a pen for my baby sister. Best trade I made so far.

Astronomers got tired of watching the moon rotate around the earth for 24 hours, so they just called it a "day".