Sons jokes

Son

"Others, Morris, Sal, Sal, Rasuba Marid, Things!"

My son is broken: "I think at home!"

Happiness!

Son

Son: Daddy, what's dark humor?

Dad: See that man over there with no arms or legs? Go tell him to stand up and clap.

Son: But Daddy, I'm blind.

Dad: Exactly.

Sex

Dad fucked Mom.

Mom fucked son.

Son fucked sister.

Sister fucked dog.

Dog fucked cat.

Cat fucked bird.

Bird fucked fish.

Fish fucked Dad.

Dad really liked it!

Nut

What did the mama nut say to her son?

โ€œIf I ever cashew doing that, I walnut be happy.โ€

Memes

Smoking

One day a son and his grandad were smoking.

Too bad only the sun was smoking. :)

Ghost

My little brother is scared of ghosts so I won't let him watch Bayern today.

Okay, I may be strict, but I won't let Tapindowski give my son a heart attack. His shocking ghosting performance today is a danger to my family and I'll ask UEFA to investigate the matter.

Milk

Dad: Son, I came back.

Son: Where is the milk?

Dad: Time for another 10 years.

Wheelchair

I got my son a bike for his birthday. The ungrateful fucker just sat in his wheelchair all day crying.

Balloon

Son: Dad, what are those two huge balloons on mommy's chest?

Dad: I don't see balloons, but I see boobs. I mean, yes, balloons.

Son: Are you sure they're balloons? Yesterday I heard Uncle Frank trying to get a milk dispenser working.

Bee

A bee said to his naughty son, "Honey, stop bee-ing abnormal and bee positive!"

Time

Hey Gwen, next time you're online can you go to "son jokes".

I commented back to you and portory.

Wheelchair

I bought my fat wheelchair son a treadmill for his birthday, then that big brainless special motherfucker cried over it and threw a fit cuz his fat special ass couldn't get up out of his wheelchair and said for Jesus to raise him up and give him working and movable legs.

Epileptic

What do you call a son of Gilgamesh that hates flashy lights? The epileptic of Gilgamesh.

Son

My son asked me, โ€œWhat is angel cake made of?โ€

I reply by listing the ingredients in Mr. Kipling angel cakes. Then he shouts โ€œSTOP!โ€ I stop as I reach food colorings. He slowly crawls towards me and says in a whisper, โ€œWell, in my angel cake, I put angels in them.โ€

I freaked out about this, so I calmed down and asked who did you put in this angel cake. He said, โ€œGrandma, the one who died last Saturday.โ€

Son

Mom: Son, did you go to school?

Son: What if I said yes?

Mom: You are in school! *slap*

Son: Mom, I am moving out and I am moving in with my girlfriend.

Mom: You are with...? Please don't move out =(

Son: Mom, stop! So what if I am moving out? I am moving into my girlfriend's home. It's only for school.

Mom: Well, you are kicked out of my home!

Son: Good.

Mom: I am sad now. Why did he move out?

If you like it, please commit down.

Sex

Son said to father, "Last night was the best you and Mom..."

Father said, "Yeah, me, you, and your mother had sex."

Son said, "It was fun licking her pussy."

Father said, "I know it was fun when I sucked YOUR dick and your mother did. Did it feel good?"

Son said, "Yes, it was. Wanna do it again tomorrow?"

Father said, "YES BUT without your mom, we'll suck each other's dick and lick it and bite and shove each other's dick next to each other."

Son said, "Yeah, and if we do it again, let's have Mom and my girlfriend join next time."

Father said, "Ok, it's time to go to bed, son."

Son said, "Ok, love you, can you and Mom sleep with me without your clothes?"

Father said, "Ok, but you have to promise to go to bed."

Son said, "Ok, see you there." ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ™ˆ๐Ÿ™ˆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ

Pastor

One day a local pastor was visiting the home of some parishioners who had a teenage son. The parents were worried about what career their son would choose, so the pastor said he had a simple test that could predict what would become of him.

He would put three objects on a table and let the young man choose whichever one he wanted to have: a Bible, a wallet, and a bottle of scotch. If the boy chose the Bible, he would probably become a priest; if he chose the wallet, he'd be a banker; and if he chose the bottle, he'd become a worthless bum.

So the parents called their son into the room, and the pastor told him he could have whichever object he wished. When the boy promptly picked up all three, the pastor cried out, "Heaven forbid! He's going to be a Jesuit!"