Son Jokes

My father said I'm to reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite, and unplugged his life support

My dad died the other day but, i was able to hear his last words"son are you still holding the ladder"

I tried to warn my son about playing Russian roulette. It went in one ear and out the other

#1 Man : pretend your age is a level, I am Level 20

#2 Man : My son Died at level 4

#1 : Lol, Your son is a noob

Gf:Hi

Bf:Hi

Gf:did you eat yet

bf:did you eat yet?

Gf:are you copying me?

Bf:are you coping me??

Gf:i love you

Bf:yeah i ate already

DAD:I'm bringing your toys to the orphanage

SON:why

DAD:your going to need them

I tried to explain to my 4 year old son that it's perfectly normal to accidentally poop your pants. -- But he's still making fun of me.

My son asked me how i'm so clean,"inside out.". I told him because of bleach. the next day I found him drinking the bleach.

Eric's mom asked to his son why his bag is heavy and if it is because of books. Eric replied "No, magazines"

What did the beaver say to his son? Dam son

my sister is pregnant i’m a be a dad

yeah u can call me daddy son

When my son was little, he loved to draw. Although he would always rip up the paper whenever there was one little slip up. Too bad he became a tattoo artist.....

i was watching my son play at the park and a lady asked me. "which one is yours" and for fun i said "i don't know i'm still choosing".

Jack and Jill went up the hill to go and have some fun Silly Jill forgot the pill and now they have a son.

A wife was cleaning 12-year-old son’s bedroom When she found a load of serious bondage gear and fetish mags, she asked her husband, “what do we do?” The husband said, “I’m no expert, but I wouldn’t fucking spank him.”

Son: “Dad, did you get the results of the DNA test back?”

Dad: “Call me George"

Dad: Hey son wanna here a joke?

Son: Sure thing, dad!

Dad: Your mother and I are getting a divorce. She found out that I was sleeping with the neighbors dog!

Son: I don't get the joke, dad.

Dad: It's my life son! My life is the joke.

My dad brought me some sunglasses but it still wasn't enough to keep my son out of my life.

A doctor is telling three women what they are addicted to. He says to the first one "You are addicted to money, you named your daughter Penny" He says to the second one "You are addicted to food, you named you daughter Candy" Then the third one whispers to her son "Come on Dick, lets go."