Son

Son Jokes

A doctor is telling three women what they are addicted to. He says to the first one "You are addicted to money, you named your daughter Penny" He says to the second one "You are addicted to food, you named you daughter Candy" Then the third one whispers to her son "Come on Dick, lets go."

Dad: "Son, does mommy like having lady-friends over?"

Son: "Nah, mostly men."

Dad: "Do you think you'd be comfortable telling that to a judge in court.."

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke marijuana, Jack got high pulled down his fly and ask if she wanna, Jill said yes and pulled up her dress and had a little fun, stupid Jill forgot the pill now they have a son

7

wo tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A small tree begins to grow between them, and the beech says to the birch, “Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?” The birch says he cannot tell, but just then a woodpecker lands on the sapling. The birch says, “Woodpecker, you are a tree expert. Can you tell if that is a son of a beech or a son of a birch?” The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree and replies, “It is neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch, It is, however, the best piece of ash I have ever poked my pecker into.”

A dad told his son never to hit girls so the sun repeid i promis. When the sun got older he was doing the dirty with "a girl " and the girl sais spank me daddy.... and the sons repsonds my dad said never to hit a girl. and the "girl" takes of the wig and its his dad and the dad said good job son!.. Son:...... um

"Son, I found a condom in your room."

"Gee, thanks, Grandpa!"

"Why are you calling me Grandpa?"

"Because I couldn't find it yesterday."

2

Dad:im dying Son:hi dying, im [name] Dad:really, now is not the time Son:im sorry Dad:hi sorry im dad (dies)

My mom told me ̈YOU SON OF A B!TCH. ̈ i told her ̈i may be a son of a b!ch butat least i am not the bitch ̈. she hated me forever.

A man finds his son climbing the roof of his house. The kid kept using all sort of material to climb up, but the dad didn't pay much attention. Next day the kid went to the state tower, and kept climbing using some adhesive gloves. The dads asks his son for a second time: " Son! why are you doing this?" the son replies: "You told me to aim up high".

So there's this uncle of female and male twins, and his sister, the mother of the twins, is stuck trying to think of a name for the children. The uncle says "I've got an idea!", and the mother gets excited, thinking this could be it. She says "What should their names be?" The uncle replies "Well for your daughter, Denise" "That's a nice name" comments the mother, "but what about my son?" The uncle simply replies "Denephew".

5

This is NOT my joke i found it on google its a texting joke Mom:Son youre grandma just passed away LOL Son:mom what do you mean LOL that means laughing out loud Mom:oh no i thought that meant lots of love i have to text everyone back!!!!