Society jokes
I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!
Yesterday I saw an orphan walking down the street. I asked him if he was ok. He said no, so I asked him if he needed help. And he said yes, so I let him in my car and said, "Don't worry, you'll be home with your parents soon." He said my parents died. I said I know.
I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere!
Why can’t an orphan get arrested?
Because they're not wanted.
Why are orphans so lucky?
Every crisp packet is family sized.
No Jews?
I like telling jokes about orphans. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What's the difference between an orphan and a criminal?
The criminal is wanted.
How do people grade pedophiles?
1st grade to 8th grade.
(I know it's orphan jokes but still)
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To get to the real estate agent.
So I told an orphan to slap themselves until they are wanted. I came back the next day to see them slapping themselves. Then I stopped them and told them to punch themselves.
The next day I saw a dead orphan.
Why was the orphan confused at the baseball game?
They kept yelling, "Go home!"
I found a rock at the park. I threw it at some orphans.
What would they do? Go to their family?
Person: You're so ugly.
Me: You ugly.
Person: I'm not a mirror.
Me: And I'm not your reflection.
I made Google Earth for orphan kids.
Sadly, it does not show where home is.
I punched an orphan and told him to go back to his parents and tell them about it... Oh, wait.
What do Bob Ross's painting and the orphanage have in common?
They're both filled with happy little accidents.
A handicapped person was making fun of me, so I walked away.
I'm 43 and my date is 19. A man rudely comes up to our table and calls me a pedophile. I told him to fuck off, this is our 10th anniversary.
They say one man's trash is another man's treasure. That's why orphanages exist!
Why is it okay to hit an orphan?
It’s not like they can tell their parents.