Smell

Smell jokes

Wee dyslexic boy and girl in class.

Wee boy says, "Can you smell gas?"

Wee girl replies, "I canny even smell my name!"

Once there were twins, Mark and Michael. Mark was the owner of an old boat. It so happened that Michael's wife died the same day that Mark's boat sank. A few days later, a kindly old woman saw Mark and mistook him for Michael. She said, "I'm sorry to hear about your loss. You must just feel terrible." Mark, thinking that she was talking about his boat, said, "Heck no. In fact, I'm sort of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing right from the beginning. Her bottom was all shriveled up and she smelled like old dead fish. She was always losing her water; she had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front too. Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked like crazy. I guess what finally finished her off was when I rented her to these four guys looking for a good time. I warned them that she wasn't very good, but they wanted to use her anyhow. The fools tried to get in her all at once and she split right up the middle!" The old lady fainted.

If a midget walks up to you and tells you your hair smells nice, is that sexual harassment?

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  • What is the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus?

    One is hairy and smells like fish, and the other is a walrus. You're welcome.

    Ur mum smells like shit, yeah, so she sucks a man off and washing machine. Yo, don’t at me, yeah, you chicken breath.

    Me: "Hey, you trashy pig woman, go in the toilet or lay on the grass where you belong."

    Trashy pig woman: "Why?"

    Because you smell like fart, and you're pretty much just a turd with lips.

    What is the worst part of milking a cow?

    The smell of the dairy air.