Why do orphans never wake up in the morning? There dad can’t wake them up
Dad: no Timmy, you don't have to worry, there is no monster sleeping under your bed, it sleeps every night in the bed next to me.
Mom:its time for sleep.Baby:is that what you think huh.Mom:*gives baby pacifier*.Baby:nice try hobo.Mom:well ill come back later to see if hes gone asleep.*few hours later*Baby:*still awake* Mom:why IS HE NOT ASLEEP?!.Baby:Lol i told you nice try haha
I love school
a doctor slept with one of his patients and thought to him self this is wrong but some doctors do it... he is a vet
Boyfreaind- let go to bed Girlfriend- no Boyfriend- why Girlfriend-because you want sex Boyfriend- no i dont NEXT MINUT The nan could hear banging
If your sleeping, and you fall in your dream, you may have died, and the angels dropped you Or you don't wake up, and you were on your way to hell
Good night
why take a nap on the toilet because it's a rest-room
Me having a good day Going on a walk on a peaceful day* my depression: hey whats up! Me: go away. My depression: well how rude. Me: 🙄. My depression: remeber that one tim...... Me: no, dont even. My depression: that we..... Me: nope. My deprssion: *says really fast*:said that one stupid joke that wasnt funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilt water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like yoy do every single night. Me: 😳😶😟. My depression: 😉 dont worry I'll always be here for you.
I think my dad is to black because whenever he goes to bed and closes his eyes he disappears .🤣
I was using my computer one time and I pressed Ctrl-Alt-Delete and Stephen Hawking went into a deep sleep
Why do flamingos sleep with one leg up? Because if they slept with both legs up they would fall over!
I dreamed I was forced to eat a giant marshmallow, but when I woke up my pillow was gone!
What is a queef? Something ur mum did in bed last night 😩😩😩🍑🍑🍑🌬️🌬️🌬️🌪️🌪️🌪️
The last 2 words you say after sex before going to sleep ?
Goodnight Mom !
Emoś are so predictable sleep, eat, cut, repeat
The moment when your to depressed to fantacize about death. - its so tiring
You’re so short you could use a pillow as your bed and still have some wiggle room.
What is the difference between the human and a tree and a house that has to walk home and walk walk home from school 🏫 was your name in your house 🏡 I did not have any good time for dinner today but I did have a good night sleep and
