Simple jokes

Hi how are you?

Fuck me.

Hi, how are you?

My sister told me a joke.

All she said was "my life."

I heard that Jimmy Savile never wanted to be famous... All he ever wanted was to settle down, and have kids.

You smell!

How do you fit 27 New Zealand tourists in a 15-seater bus?

Simple. All in the ashtray.

What is a tuba plus tuba? -- Fourba.

I made a website for orphans. It doesn’t have a home page.

What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

What is the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.

People always ask what the secret of our family's happiness is. It is simple really.

1. Television and computer games are limited to a couple of hours each week.

2. We all give each other a hand when needed.

Last but not least, we play Twister.

I am crying tears of joy rn.😭 I was wrongfully denied my visa. ☠️ They took me to the Q&A section, that I needed to answer one simple question for my visa to be granted.

The question was the original synonym of Bench. I shakily answered "Pristiano Penaldo" 😭. I was right guys ✅🛫

It's sad how families can be torn apart from something as simple as wild dogs.

Someone asked me why I'm still here... the answer is simple: I don't want to be used as a school assembly.

To the guy asking what joy I find in suicide jokes, the answer is simple. I make suicide jokes to cope with my crippling depression. Must be working, cause I'm still here.