what do you call a ice skating dwarf?
a midget spinner
What do lesbian cook for dinner They don't they just eat out
What's the difference between my thighs and my eyebrows? Nothing, I slit both of them.
What's the difference between a teacher and a train?
The teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Chew chew!"
Ya ever think about the twin towers plan? Me neither. It all came crashing down.
I wont ever Forget my dads last words: "OH GOD THE POLICE!!!"
Say what you want about Hitler, he wasn't all that bad. After all, he killed Hitler.
New Teacher: "I was an orphan as a kid."
Students: "OOF"
Teacher: "Is anyone missing?"
Students: "Your parents."
what's the cool thing about bringing a pack of gum or a shotgun to school.
when you pull one out everybody wants to be your friend. :)
whats an emos least favorite show? Dr. Phil
Q. What’s white, sticky, and better to spit than to swallow?
A. Toothpaste.
What’s the similarity between peas from Tesco and emos? They both have barcodes
People claim that Trump has Russian ties.
FAKE NEWS!
All of Trump's ties are made in China.
so i was on the phone with a scam caller, he said he knew where i lived and would kill my children and wife jokes on him i already did.
Glory 🕳 equals 👨 👨 👨 👨 👨 bonding
sticks and stones may break my bones but a crowbar could do it so much quicker
I entered ten puns into a contest to see which one would win.
No pun in ten did
A prisoner was told how he'll be executed. Needless to say, he was shocked.
Tell someone to look in their shirt and spell attic hehe
My aunt's star sign was cancer, pretty ironic how she died. -- She was eaten by a giant crab.
