Short jokes
What cookies did the orphans never try?
Home made cookies!
When you realize you forgot to mop your room, you hear footsteps.
Why doesn’t Joe Biden visit children with cancer in hospitals?
Because he can’t sniff their hair.
Roses are red, violets are blue, if you take Kirby’s food, he will stab you.
My battery lasted longer than your sad, depressing life.
White girl: So this crystal cures my depression and helps me lose weight?
Me holding a rock of meth: YES!!!
Those rape alarms give you a headache, don't they?
Why did Jeffery Dahmer not eat old people?
He does not like roasted vegetables.
How does a disabled kid walk to school?
He wishes he had the facilities to.
What is an orphan's dad's job?
A magician because he makes himself disappear.
When you meet your gf at the family reunion.
How do you tell if someone is depressed?
The brains on the wall.
What's the difference between Wacko Jacko and Elvis Presley?
14 number 1 hits.
If you’ve got depression, then your life is a joke. Everyone laughs at both.
My cousin is in a wheelchair and wanted to battle.
So I went up a step and said, "It's over Anakin, I have the high ground!"
Guy: shows girlfriend his dick.
Girlfriend: "Cool, where is it?"
So, my girlfriend left me. I took her wheelchair, and she came back crawling.
Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff? Neither did I til I seen his Head and Shoulders on the dashboard.
People trying to stop me from being depressed: “Just cheer up!”
Me: “WOW, I NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT!”
Yo mama so fat she ate Saturn and mistook it for bubble gum.