Short jokes
What if soy milk is just regular milk trying to introduce itself in Spanish?
Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry.
A girl tried 77.34 (77.34) times to think of a word opposite of BYE. Then her brother divided the word BYE. 77.34 divided by 100. TRY IT!!
How do you make Stephen Hawking mad?
You turn off the WiFi router.
As a scientist, I confirm that you speak too fast. It has a speed of 1 bullshit per second.
What do you call a prostitute with no arms or legs?
Cash and carry.
What do you call an acid with a bad attitude?
A-Mean-O-Acid.
If I send a clown to deliver flowers to my wife...
...is that a romantic jester?
Why did the Canadian cross the road?
To say sorry to the other side.
Knock knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya who? Sorry, I prefer Google.
If Silver Surfer and Iron Man teamed up, they would be great ALLOYS!
Why does the sky think it's so powerful?
Because it's always looking down on us.
What does a transgender call his/her parent?
Transparent.
Your mama is so short, she does backflips under her bed.
Which fish is the most famous?
The star fish!
Knock knock! Who's there? Deja. Deja who? Knock knock!
Q: What do you call a cranky cow?
A: Moooooooody.
What does Drake call his rake?
Da-Rake.
You know the drill, but do you know the hammer? Hah, nailed that one.
But I also think I screwed it up.
What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Polish.