Short jokes
How do you communicate to the dead?
Jump up and down on the ground and speak in Morse code!
Why did the elephant get kicked out of the public pool?
Because he kept on dropping his trunks! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
What did the fish say to the other fish when it got hooked?
"That's what you get for not keeping your mouth shut."
Why was the elephant woozy?
Because he was trunk.
Question: What's the smallest thing on earth?
Answer: Your brain.
What’s the difference between a mother and a girlfriend?
A girlfriend likes a bad boy.
Ert.
Why can't orphans cross roads?
They don't have a parent to hold hands with.
How do you know Thor has your back?
He's an Asgardian (ass guardian).
Why don't people sit next to the cheetah during a test?
Because he's a cheetah!
How did the inkjet printer kill himself?
He drank cyan-ide.
Who betrayed Cheesus Christ?
Goudas.
I was asked to give a bicycle joke, but I couldn't...
I was two tired.
"BU" is the element of a surprise. Boo!
Dodo.
Someone booted Stephen Hawking offline. Maybe next time he will stand for the pledge/anthem.
Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign?
A: The drunk guy runs it, and the stoner waits for it to turn green!
If water makes you laugh, then jokes make you pee.
I'm making a new movie, it's called "Veggie Tales." My star actor is Stephen Hawking.
There's an orphan in my class... For some reason, he never leaves.