Short jokes
You were born on a highway in a car crash, I wonder why.
What is Godzilla’s least favorite ball?
A King Kong ball.
I don't see why women are complaining about the glass ceiling. I mean, if they reach high enough, they can clean it...
What did the orphan say to the adopter?
Nothing, he just stared.
How does an emo greet people?
“What’s down?”
What do you call someone with a big butt?
The Thightanic!
What is half of nine?
"ni"
A peanut and another peanut walk into a bar.
One was a salted peanut.
What did the fox say to the fire?
You look hot!
What do you call it when Red Sox can't pull out?
Boston cream pie.
What plate do you need to eat in a car? A license plate!
My mom once told me to spread positivity across the world, so I did.
I spread Covid across the globe because I tested positive :D
Why did the rock not risk going to the other side of the road?
It's a damn rock, mate. It's not gonna walk!
If I had two nickels every time PETA parodied a game, I'd have 14.
*Shotguns in a nutshell*
2B: MUST.
4B: ADD.
6B: MORE.
12B: *B A R R E L S*
*And that's how multi-barrel shotguns were made.*
Why are you guys making fun of priests?
Because you have a suga daddy already.
Why did the joke cross the street?
Squirtle to Bulbasaur: "You kinda cum... like a baka..."
Aha, tomato macaroni is bad, hahaha.
(I don't even know what on earth I put here, but okay.)
Do emos get jealous when their phone dies?