Short jokes
What did Jesus say when he was left hanging on the cross?
"Well this is one hell of a way to spend my Easter vacation!"
A lion would never drive while drunk.
But a tiger wood.
The best part about Asian jokes is that the only people that can be offended can't see the jokes.
Why do disabled people not like comedians?
Because they do stand up.
Girls: ๐ *Period* โ๏ธ๐
Men: ๐ฟ *Growth* ๐ฟ๐ฟ๐ฟ
My jokes are so dark that I am surprised that the cops didn't shoot them yet.
What do spiders and Black people have in common?
When theyโre black, they kill you.
How do you know youโre at a gay church?
Half the congregation is kneeling.
Why is the number 10 always scared?
Answer: Heโs in the middle of 9/11.
Hi. Hhhh yrddd.
What do you call a woman covered in mud? A dirty dishwasher.
Voting is like doing a group project in school.
I did my part, but Iโm worried the rest of you are going to fuck this up.
My lesbian friends bought me a nice watch for my birthday. I think they got confused when I said, "I wanna watch."
The best way to tell a Hindu person and a Muslim person apart is asking them:
"Are you 7-Eleven or 9/11?"
How do you know you had a gay cookout?
All the hotdogs taste like ass.
What do you call a Black man having a seizure?
Chocolate shake.
What do you call an environmentally conscious Mexican?
A green bean.
Whatโs the LGBTQ national anthem?
"Somewhere Over the Rainbow" by Harold Arlen.
What is the world's strongest material?
The tree that Paul Walker hit.
How do you kill a spider?
Just get an autistic person.