Short jokes
Even though I look completely white, I am apparently 70% black!
Until I realized that it was a mouth swab test.
God, when terminally ill children beg him to heal them:
God: No, I don’t want to.
When Helen Keller tries singing the national anthem at the Super Bowl,
Aaaaaaaaaa Aaaaaaaaaa Aaaaaaaaaa.
UU looks like boobies, hehe.
Why are women so bad at parking?
Because they've been lied to about what 8 inches look like their whole lives.
Why don't women parachute naked?
That annoying whistling sound on the way down.
I asked the gym trainer what type of machine I should use to get the best looking women.
He said the ATM outside.
I told her she needed to put her dog on a leash, and her boyfriend is still on a leash to this day. 😮💨
How does a woman scare a gynecologist?
By becoming a ventriloquist.
I have a lot of respect for trans women.
That surgery takes balls!
If the UK is 6 hours ahead of us, why didn't they just warn us about 9/11?
Humor is like skin; the darker it gets, the less people like it.
Pulled pork? Yeah, I cranked my hog today, too.
Has Covid-19 forced you to wear glasses and a mask at the same time?
You may be entitled to condensation.
COVID-19 is like pasta.
Asians invented it, Italians spread it.
My girlfriend got COVID.
This is the perfect time to propose to her. She might just say yes because of the lack of taste.
It's obvious Bill Gates didn't create COVID.
None of his other products are able to release new versions this frequently.
What kind of animal makes a good bottle opener?
A male Duck on Viagra.
The worst comedians take 9 months to make a joke. Then they spend the rest of their lives trying to forget it.
"Why did the band teacher get arrested?"
"For fingering a minor." Ahaha, so funny!