Short jokes
What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"
What does B.I.B.L.E. stand for?
Bull Shit In Book Lacking Evidence.
Does it cycle now?
What goes Snap, Crackle, and Pop?
A neck.
What goes pop pop sizzle sizzle?
Two dead babies in an acid bath.
What do you call finding half of a worm?
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh moan for me.
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite type of candy?
A: Loli-pops.
Why is Beast Boy so good at flying?
Terra hasn't forgiven him.
My girlfriend has a huge crush on Jupiter, I mean she fell HARD!
Me, smashes mouse after losing a match; everybody at the pet race: :O
I saw a tree. I looked up, and there was an apple hanging. And then I said, "Wow, that guy is lucky!"
My wife said if I don't get off the computer, she's gonna slam my head into the keyboard, but I think I'll ajlkfsdhnvkwr;anhf.
#GwenComeBack Gwen please come back!
I'd hit you, but I don't want to go to jail for animal abuse.
You know I'm not too into black girls, but Kobe's daughter was smoking!
Bet y'all did not know Kobe had blue eyes! One blew east and one blew west.
Ya know, Kobe made a real impact on the earth!
My therapist said time heals all wounds, so I stabbed him. Now we wait.
Q: What do you call a pigeon that is full of poop that flies in front of a car?
A: A suicide bomber.
Q: Why is China so bad at baseball?
A: They already ate the bat.
What does a woman call Stormzy in bed?
Stiff chocolate.