Short jokes

Short jokes

What does the cross guard say to the cows crossing the road?

Mooooooooooo along!

You know that your grades are bad when you get a 66% on a test and your grade goes up.

Why don't Japanese people like iPhones?

Because they are afraid of American airdrops.

It's quite ironic that people tell you "Happy Birthday," then they want to give you a spanking.

Before I die, I'm going to ask to be cremated.

Then I'm going to eat a bunch of popcorn kernels.

Then I'll die and get cremated. BOOM! I'm popcorn!

What did the pelican say when he finished shopping?

"Put it in my bill."

An Autistic chef made hamburgers out of donkey meat.

He called them: “ASPERGER’S”

How do you make a suicidal guy go bungee jumping?

Tie the bungee cord around his neck.

Everything I fall in love with leaves me. Maybe if I fall in love with my depression, it'll leave me too.