Shooting Jokes

My best friend was Was recently gunned down in a drive-by shooting and died a virgin, but he wasn’t buried one

Osama Bin Laden, Josef Stalin and Hitler are robbing a bank, who do the cops shoot first?

A black guy

Q. Why did Hitler shoot himself? A. Because his mother taught him to take out the trash.

A man find out his wife is cheating on him with his best friend, so he hires a hitman to shoot his wife in the head, and his friend in the balls. The hitman charges $100 per bullet. The man agrees. Later, they set up, and the hitman looks through the scope and says “I can save you $100”

What is the difference between an American and a computer? An American doesn’t have trouble shooting

Sonic says... April 1st is the best day do a school shooting they will think it’s a joke 😃

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

What do birds and children have in common? If you shoot them they die.

Jesus shows up and says you’ve got to go to church. You follow him in and under their breath it sounds like somebody says you steal and you say in your mind knowing you have before I’m sorry then somebody caughs and under their breath it sounds like they say again you steal so you whisper quietly I’m sorry... ...then somebody in German says shoot that son of a bitch

Y did the csi team have to go to the purple rain shoot? ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤bc they had to dust for prince hahaha

A panda walks into a restaurant orders some food and eats it. Once he was done he shoots the waiter then leaves. Police and detectives arrive at the scene, they ask the waiter "who did this to you? what happened?" The waiter replies "A panda, eats shoots and leaves"

My friend got arrested for shooting an unarmed black teen

He was charged for impersonating a police officer.

What did the canadian say when a guy shot his bever ?. It is ok i forgive you.

A man shot into a crowd at the train station and didn't hit one person, when the police asked why he missed, someone said cause he gay.

He couldn't shoot straight

Q: Why do Americans fish with guns?

A: To shoot up the whole school

Two hunters are in the woods when one of them collapses. His hunting buddy immediately calls 911. "My friend isn't breathing," he shouts into the phone. "What should I do?" "Relax," the operator tells him. "I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There's silence, and then a gunshot. The guy gets back on the phone and says, "OK, now what?"