She jokes
Yo mama so fat, she fell in love with a skinny dude and tried to hug him but crushed him.
Yo mama so stupid, she thought Kobe Bryant survived the plane crash.
Me and my friends were talking. Then we started talking about our wives. I said, "So, I married a volcano for a wife. You never know when she will blow up."
Your Mom is so fat, she could be Trump's border wall.
What did Stevie Wonder's mom do to punish him as a child?
She rearranged all the furniture.
I'm pretty socially awkward when talking to girls, so I watched a video on how to keep conversations going.
The guy said to try and find things that remind you of something else and talk about that. For example, "that oak tree over there reminds me of the one we used to climb in my backyard as a kid. It used to be so much fun... and so on."
So next time I was having a conversation with a girl, I saw a red truck. So I said, "that red truck reminds me of the time my house burned down when I was 6." She said, "oh, and the fire trucks came to your house?" And I said, "no, I was getting molested in a red truck when my house burned down."
Why doesn't the orphan date the girl?
Because she is a home-y.
Yo mama so old, I bet she was born when dinosaurs were made, and also she killed them with they breath! 😭😭
Yo mama so fat, when you married your sister, she was big enough to sit on the groom's side and the bride's side.
My sister and I were hanging out when she opened her drawer and pulled out 3 condoms and said, "Pick one."
There’s this girl who gets bullied for being in a wheelchair.
Why don’t she stand up for herself?
Ur mom is so fat that when she came to the front door, she was already at the back door.
TFW you're having sex with your German girlfriend and she won't stop telling you her age.
Today, I operated on a little girl. She needed O-negative blood. We didn’t have any, but her twin sister has O-negative blood. I explained to her that it was a matter of life and death. She sat quietly for a moment, and then said goodbye to her parents. I didn’t think anything of it until after we took her blood and she asked, “So when will I die?” She thought she was going to give her life for her sister. Thankfully they both died.
Yo mama so disgusting that when she took a shower, the water turned into ditchwater.
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a ravishing blonde, and an old lady are sharing a compartment on a train as it winds its way through the Alps. Every now and then the train passes through a tunnel, during which time the compartment is plunged into complete darkness. On one such occasion, a ringing slap is heard, and as the train passes back into daylight, the Frenchman is rubbing his sore, red cheek.
The old lady thinks, "I bet that dirty Frenchman fondled the blonde, and she struck the pervert."
The blonde thinks, "I bet that filthy Frenchman was looking to grope me in the dark, mistook the old lady for me, and she slapped him."
The Frenchman thinks, "I bet that perfidious Englishman touched up the blonde in the dark, and she slapped me by mistake."
The Englishman thinks, "I can't wait for another tunnel so I can slap that French twat again."
Yo mama's so fat, she irons her clothes on the driveway.
Yo mama's so fat, when she wants to take a bath, they need to make more H2O.
A man walks into a bar with an alligator and a stick. He walks up to the bartender and offers to put on a show for the bar's patrons in exchange for a drink. The bartender agrees, so he pulls down his pants, sticks his dick in the alligator's mouth, and starts whacking it with the stick. After he's done and gets his drink, he asks if anyone else would like a go.
A lady gets up and says yes, she would like a go, asks that he doesn't hit her with the stick.
"Grandma, tell me a story!" I said as we huddled near the campfire.
"Alright," she said, "Once, there was a tree named Timmy, he was my best tree friend. I used to read books under him and climb all his branches."
"Where is Timmy now?" I asked.
Grandma pointed to the campfire.