She jokes

Your mama is so stupid, Patrick Starr ran away because he thought she might be contagious.

Tonight, I picked up an anorexic prostitute.

It was really easy because she was only about 90 pounds.

My friend jokingly confessed to me she did prostitution (consensual).

She wasn't joking. :0

We are 15....

"Rajesh get on bus, so many people, squeeze here squeeze there. He daydream about naughty stuff, like coffee spill but not coffee. Bus move, stop, he press close to pretty lady, she smell nice. Rajesh think how funny if something else spill, make whole bus ride wild." He laugh to self, bus ride never boring now!

A buddy and I checked out some books from a local library. When we returned them, he said, "Your sister works the returns, right?" I told him, "Yes, she does, and she will be here in about five minutes." He said, "Why don’t we put a cookbook in the women’s sports section?" I told him, "I love it!" So I picked out a Reese Witherspoon book.

Leo must be an INTERIOR DECORATOR... because when she enters a room, it becomes UGLY.

Yo mama so fat when she steps on the scale it says, "We want your weight not your phone number."

Yo mama is so fat, she doesn't need internet, she's already WORLDWIDE.

I'm so bored and miserable, that I have sex with my inflatable girlfriend every night.

The best part? She don't talk back.

Your mom smells so bad she could stun a horse in a field.

Your mum's vagina is so ravenous, that last night we both ended up on the living room floor, with her on top. She was eating my creamy young face off.

Your mom is the biggest tosser on the planet, yeah, you heard right.

I don't have to strain myself a blood vessel and be wankin' solo anymore; she saved me a whole load of arthritis.

Must be heartwrenching for a loyal husband to watch his wife dry shagging me on the living room carpet.

I mean, once she started, she couldn't get enough.

She asked me if I was hung like a horse, but I said no.

I'm hung like a person who wants to die, but then the rope broke.

Beauty is blind? Ya damn right, 'cause that's what happened when she saw your ass.

Opal didn't hack RapBoat's account, she WAS RapBoat the whole time.

Women should be seen and not heard.

But how would you control that if she was screaming "NO!!!" in the bedroom?

The best news about a pretty girl with special needs is that you can get her to do exactly what you want her to do.

I mean, she probably thinks receiving oral is like 100% blood sausage coming right at her.

Yo mama so Irish that she thought the Chicago Shamrox were a Quadball team.

Yo mama so fat, when she walked in front of the TV, I missed 3 episodes.