She jokes

How can you tell that a blonde likes you? She only gives three fucking nights in a row.

Yo mama so fat that when she was on the moon, she had it sent right into the abyss of outer space.

My ex was so full of shit, she probably poured toilet cleaner in her nose to get relief.

Do you know who Helen Keller is?

Neither did she.

A teenage girl got a summer job dogsitting for a gigantic English Mastiff. She spent hours with the dog, and walked a little funny when she got home.

"What are you doing all day?"

"Knot a lot."

Yo mama so fat, when she walked in the room, we missed three seasons of our show!

Your mama so ugly she went by a TV and missed eight episodes.

Yo momma's so short that she fell off the toilet and broke her leg.

Your mamma is so fat that she saved me a lot of money by sitting in my car when I wanted to buy a low rider.

Yo mama is so fat that she is not wrong when she says the world revolves around her.

Yo mama so stupid she thought seaweed was something fish smoke.

My friend nearly drowned in her bowl of muesli the other day. She was pulled in by a strong "currant."

One day I asked my mom where kids came from. She said the man who went to the milk store.

Five years later, he came back and left again.

Mary has a house near a forest. She lives with her bro, and she once asked, "How many trees are there?" Her bro said: "I don't know." She said: "Tree."

There was a fire at my high school when I was in Year 7.

When the local newspaper interviewed my teacher, they asked her how she was seeing the "bright side" of it.

She said, "Well, at least our new students got a warm welcome!"

54 students died that day.

Yo mama is so ugly, she makes the Flash stop dead in his tracks.

Yo mama is so ugly, she gave Michael Myers nightmares.

Why did Shelley fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Yo mama so short that when she plays mini golf, it's just called golf.

Where did Sally go when she went in the minefield?

Everywhere.