Sexuality jokes
Why can't orphans be gay?
'Cause they can't call anyone "Daddy."
How do lesbians have sex? It’s too complicated. I’d have to show you.
Can you go as a horse for Halloween?
Well, if you do, I can't wait to ride you!
What do you call a lesbian Dinosaur?
Lickalotapuss.
Killua is hot, why?
He's gay.
She really wanted a boner.
What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?
He said he was awfully touched!
What did the tree say when it gets horny? My wood has a splinter.
Why are carpenters never horny after work?
Because they’ve already spent all day getting hammered and nailing things.
My son caught me masturbating the other day and was like, "Dad, what are you doing?" I said, "Don't worry, you'll be doing it soon." He said, "Why is that?" I told him, "My arm is getting tired."
Friend: Name one gay person off the top of your head.
Me: Me.
Skedaddle skedoodle, I'm gonna go beat my noodle.
Man 1: Dude, Viagra is for pussies. Real men don’t need Viagra.
Man 2: I thought Viagra was for dicks?
Did you hear about the lesbians who are suing their contractor?
He used nails when they wanted tongue and groove.
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One serves the nailed to the cross, one nailed by her boss.
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One is for Sunday morning, and one is for Sunday night.
I'm gay.
What's hard about walking through a bunch of dead babies?
My dick.
The first priest asks the second, "How long do we keep the babies in the holy water?" The priest replies, "No clue... I close my eyes when I masturbate!"
Three guys are standing in an alley on an alien planet, and the psycho one says, "However many tits your girl has is how many balls you have!"
The first guy says, "Ha! My girlfriend has six! I'm racked up!" The second guy said, "Eh, I am happy with two balls." The third guy said, "Shit! My girlfriend is flat as fuck!"
A guy listening in enters and says, "Bro, you actually have girlfriends. I do not. Does that mean I have a pussy?"