Sexual Abuse jokes
A pedophile pulls up to little Jonny, lowers his window and asks, "hey little boy, if I give you a lolly, will you come in my car?" Little Jonny replies, "Give me the whole packet and I’ll come in your mouth."
What's similar between a priest and McDonald's?
They both shove their meat in between 10 year old buns.
What are some other names for rape? There’s the classic “struggle snuggle,” but then there’s my personal favorite “fuck fight”.
What's the difference between a priest and McDonald's?
They both like to slide their meat between 10 year old buns.
What do an angler fish and a pedophile have in common?
They both like to hide in dark places, look creepy, and like to lure small creatures.
What's a pedophile's favorite part of Halloween? Free delivery.
Incest. A game the whole family can play.
What's worse than having ants in your pants?
Uncles.
How do you know your sister is on her period? Your dad's c**k tastes like s**t!
What's a paedophile's favorite footwear?
White Vans.
Times have been so tough lately, I have had to jerk off the dog just to feed the cat.
Two gay guys, two lesbians, and two pedophiles have a race.
What is the order of finish?
1. Lesbians. Doing 69 the whole way.
2. Pedophiles. Coming in a little behind.
3. Gay guys. Still packing their shit.
Why did the guitar teacher get arrested?
He fingered a minor.
Pedophiles don't win races because they like to come in a little behind.
Why can’t pedophiles ever win races? Because they are always coming in a little behind.
What’s the coolest thing about having a 12 year old friend...
You get to meet Chris Hansen!
How long does it take a baby to cook in the microwave?
I don't know. I close my eyes when I masturbate.
What is a pedophile's favorite dating site?
Kinder
The judge asked me, "How does 5 to 10 years sound?"
I said, "Sexy."
Why was the guitarist arrested?
He fingered a minor.