Sex

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My father taught me a lesson of sex in a hypothetical way.

My stepmother gave me a lesson [on] how [it] is going inside?

Why did people invent glow in the dark condoms?

So gay people can have lightsaber duels.

Just saying this, but I hate how many little kids there are on this site, and when they post, they have the worst posts about "sex", so I'm just saying how they act immature.

Did you know that big black dicks can be weapons and can kill people?

Floyd Mayweather proved it when he gave it to Logan Paul in the ass.

Little Johnny is walking in the hallway and goes in his brother's room and catches him watching something, so he asks, "What you watching?" His brother replies, "Nothing," and drops his phone. But then he gets a text from his teacher, who texted him a picture of her naked, saying, "After school come fuck me." So Johnny looks and says, "Ew, I'm telling Mom," and he ran with his brother's phone and showed his mom, and his mom said, "Ok, Johnny, I'll take care of you brother," and she told him to leave, and he did.

And his brother ran in his mom's room naked, and his mom said, "Oh, that's big. How about you do what your teacher told you to do to her, to me?" And a few hours later, Johnny heard weird noises coming from the room, so he walked in and saw them (his brother and mom) having sex, so he closed the door and walked away.

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    • A woman goes to buy a parrot.

    There is one for 200, 500, and one for 15 bucks.

    She asks why the last one is so cheap.

    The man at the counter says, "It used to live in a brothel/sex house."

    The lady buys it anyway.

    When she gets home, it says, "Fuck me, a new brothel!"

    When her daughters get home, it says, "Fuck me, 2 new prozzies!"

    When the father gets home, the parrot says, "Fuck me, Daryl, haven't seen you in the brothel in weeks!"

    My teacher asks all of us in class, "What is your favorite thing in the world?"

    Josh: Cookies.

    Jacob: My parents.

    Erika: My Friends!

    Brody: Lamborghinis.

    Me: Pulling over in a car in the middle of nowhere at night with my girlfriend and getting in the back seat where the magic happens... ;-)

    My Teacher: Ok, everyone that was all good...WAIT A DANG SECOND!

    *Everyone Looks at Me With A Weird Face....

    A little girl being Girl: "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned."

    Priest: "What did you do, child?"

    Girl: "I called a man a son of a bitch."

    Priest: "Why did you call him a son of a bitch?"

    Girl: "Because he touched my hand."

    Priest: "Like this?" (as he touches her hand)

    Girl: "Yes, Father."

    Priest: "That's no reason to call a man a son of a bitch."

    Girl: "Then he touched my breast."

    Priest: "Like this?" (as he touched her breast)

    Girl: "Yes, Father."

    Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."

    Girl: "Then he took off my clothes, Father."

    Priest: "Like this?" (as he takes off her clothes)

    Girl: "Yes, Father."

    Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."

    Girl: "Then he stuck his you know what into my you know where."

    Priest: "Like this?" (as he stuck his you know what into her you know where)

    Girl: "YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES FATHER!!!"

    Priest: (after a few minutes): "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."

    Girl: "But, Father, he had AIDS!"

    Priest: "THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!"

    Y'uree: Bruh... listen... gangbang... sex... the same.

    Halyei: Hello Y'uree and Jarod. How are you guys today?

    Y'uree: Well, sexy girls like you should be ass-fucked or fucked so hard that all you can do is talk or nothing at all?

    Halyei: Thank you, I suck dicks too!

    Jarod: Are you Breya???

    Halyei: No... do I look like that flying bastard???

    Jarod: Ugh... no... baby, you're free to go!

    Halyei: Sorry, I miss cursing and having sex with her too! Sorry for being an idiot. I really miss her. Maybe you and I can give her a threesome??? No, I'm not gay! WHY!!!!!!! Can you come to the please fuck me! It's the fuckable girls contest and I want to win! Sorry!