Sex jokes
If a heterosexual man wanted his dick sucked, what would a feminist say to him that a gay man would never say to him?
"Not now, I have a headache."
Why don't feminists like to eat hotdogs? Because they remind them of men's dicks.
Kenney lost his virginity to a $10 hooker, but he only had to pay $5. She was his sister, so he got the family discount.
My girlfriend and I played Russian Roulette once.
We had sex afterwards even though she lost.
What is white and comes out after you have sex?
Cum!
What's the hardest part about sex with a Thai girl?
Her, probably.
Barney-1 2 3 what number comes next?
Barney-that’s right it’s penis!
Lady: I am going to come to your house.
Man: Ok.
An hour later, the lady is at the man's house. The man meets her outside of the house.
Man: You are going to cum to my house!
And then he fucks her.
Lady: Will you fuck me?
Man: No, I don’t have a penis.
Lady pulls down man's pants and looks in them. "Yes, you do!" she says.
Man: Oh, I forgot it was there.
Mother: We need to talk about sex...
Jason: Oh, sex, tell me what do you wanna know.
Jason had a big whooping from his mother and big spanking from his dad.
My girl walks in the room in nude mode and sat on my dick. I said, "What up, your pussy?" She said, "Your dick."
Fat girls give the best head because they are hungry and eat the most dick.
What is the difference between a pornstar and a mosquito?
No one stops sucking.
Say yes if you wanna fuck.
What did your mom say last night? "Go harder!"
Why were people sad when John F. Kennedy got shot? All he got was head.
Girl lol feel dick in mouth on you.
What is long and hard and full of seamen?
A submarine.
Guess what? If your mom ever wants to have sex with you, tell her to make another.
Why did the man cross the road?
Because his dick was stuck in the chicken!
Child: "Mom, what's an 'orgasm'?"
Mom: "I don't know, dear. Try asking your father."