See jokes

Magician: "I am the greatest magician in the whole world. Look, now you see the rabbit in the hat, and now it is gone!"

Redneck girl: "That's nothing. My dad is the greatest magician! He disappears for a whole year and reappears at Christmas for a couple of hours!"

I threw a dodgeball at a blind kid and got him out... guess I can say he didn't see it coming!

Your hairline is so far back, I couldn't see you even when Will Smith slapped it.

Maybe you should go on eBay to see if they have a life for sale.

One day, a man visited an orphanage.

Then he sees a kid crying. The man asked, "Where are your parents?"

The kid cries even harder.

Troll your friend by saying "I" and saying "cup," and then tell them that that means "I see you pee."

LOL

There is also "lettuce cup," which means "let us see you pee."

You're so fat, you drank an invisibility potion, and everyone could still see you!

An emo kid sees his clothes hanging to dry, and he says to his clothes, "I wish I were you!"

God: I feel like I'm forgetting something... oh no, Earth! *sees it on fire* Oh, it's fine.

People of Earth: *running and screaming*

Santen: *to God* Really?

Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street when all of a sudden, Paddy falls down a manhole. Murphy shouts down, "Paddy, is it dark down there?"

Paddy shouts up, "Dunno Murphy, I crnt see a fecking thing!"

I just did a test to see who my soulmate is, and it said "best friend." So I guess I am gay. I think so, WTF.

Why did the orphan cross the road?

To find their way to the store to see their dad.

Want to see a funny joke? Look in the mirror.

A flock of swallows were migrating south as a jet flew past them.

"Why was that one flying so fast?" asked one. Another answers, "Can't you see his tail is burning?"

Why did the kid throw the clock out the window? He wanted to see time fly.

I have to say that Halloween is my favorite day...

Every time they see me, kids and mothers run away...

I don’t have a costume so please don’t reprimand...

When I open up the door, I’ve got my penis in my hand.

What do orphans not see on a controller?

The home button.

Dad: Boy, come sit in this hole while I brace the ground.

Boy: I don't want to see Grandpa, he scares me!

Hi Alex, you will probably not see this till the morning, but I just wanted to say I have had fun since you were here. Also, thank you so much for protecting me and being there for me. And yeah, have a good day!

Stupid Mary Jane was swinging on the swing.

Her momma said, "Stupid Mary Jane, don't swing so high, the boys will see your underwear!"

Stupid Mary Jane laughed and laughed. She knew she wasn't wearing no underwear.