Science jokes
Why can’t you trust an atom?
Because they make up everything.
Why does no one look up at Steven Hawking?
You have to look down to see him.
When an asteroid is coming to kill us all:
98.9% of the population: OMG, we're all gonna die!
1% of the population: Eh... I never had any friends anyway.
Alia: ROLL THE INTRO!
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot wheels.
What was the one test that Steven Hawking couldn't pass?
reCAPTCHA
Are you made of Gold, Titanium, Sulfur, Titanium, and Carbon?
Cause damn, you lookin' kinda Au Ti S Ti C!
Stephen Hawking is not dead; he just needs to charge.
Why did the royal wedding get more publicity than a school shooting?
Cause a royal wedding doesn't happen once a week.
What did the String Theorist say when his wife caught him in bed with another woman?
"Wait, I can explain everything!"
How do u know Stephen Hawking is having a seizure?
He spills coffee on his iPad.
He's not dead, his batteries have run out.
Q. Why is Stephen Hawking so good at air guitar?
A. Because he has excellent string theory.
What’s made of wood and is zig zag shaped?
Stephen Hawking's coffin.
These jokes are nearly as dead as Steven Hawkings.
Steven Hawking walks into a bar, the bartender says...
WAITTTT WHATTT
I have been reading this book about zero gravity. I can’t seem to put it down.
What is the chemical formula for a banana? BaNa2
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you cannot helium, you have to curium. If you cannot curium, you have to barium!
RIP Stephen Hawking who was buried today... he did always love black holes.
God, I miss Stephen Hawking.
He was brainier than Kurt Cobain's ceiling.