School Jokes

people talking me asking whats the worst day in the year for them. Person 1: The first day of school cause i don't like going to school

Person 2: Valentines day cause its to lovey

Me: oh nice mines my birthday cause its when i was born

Average Kid: brings mp3 to school

Rich Kid: Brings mp4 to school

Quiet Kid: Brings an mp5

Whats the difference between a school bus and my Dad's van?

Schools buses usually don't have screaming and crying children

At school, Little Johnny’s classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it’s very easy to blackmail them by saying, “I know the whole truth.” Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. Johnny’s mother greets him at home, and he tells her, “I know the whole truth.” His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, “Just don’t tell your father.” Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, “I know the whole truth.” The father promptly hands him $40 and says, “Please don’t say a word to your mother.” Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, “I know the whole truth.” The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, “Then come give your Daddy a great big hug!”

One time this kid came back from school and said "Mom I have one good news and one bad news, which one do you wanna hear first?" And his mom said "Good news please.'' and the boy said "I got 100% on my math test today" and his mom gave him a hug, and the boy said "Now to the bad news, I LIED"

I was in Alabama last year. I walked into a store and noticed a couple kissing eachother and I said excuse where is the bathroom and the man said right over there. I went into the bathroom and then heard the girl say "Dad I have to go to school soon"

The teacher asked,"why are you in school on a saturday?" I told her my mum told me to go to hell.

When you’re hiding from the school shooter next to people who made fun of you for having an Android: “HEY SIRI”

And that concludes your French oral. You can put your trousers back up and I'll see you on Monday

What’s an abreviation for school in America

Shooting range

Jokes just as dead as the victims

How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar?

They never get old.

I was in school yesterday and I saw this emo kid with a new cut so I said, "I like ya cut g." And I slapped him. I don't know why I got in so much trouble. All I did was slap his wrist.

There was a kidnapping at school.

Don't worry, he woke up.

In school, we learned that squirrels stick their nuts in trees. So, just like my uncle dave...

Why can’t an orphan get suspended or expelled from school? Because they need to contact parents.

like this if you are in elementary, middle school, or high school

I went to the shooting range the other day after a while I realized I was the only one there so I decided to go home and saw on the news that there was a mass school shooting and there were reporters on the scene, man I knew I should have stayed around a little longer.