School Shooting Jokes

Teachers: when ever there’s a school shooting hide under the desk Students: hiding under desk Shooter: Well no ones in here

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

you call it a school shooting. I call it an unfair shootout.

So there was school shooting in Florida why didn't the shooter just go to Disney.......sorry i just work there and I'm trying to get people to come on down.

Why are school shootings branded “very American”?

1. They usually happen in the usa 2. They’re like the forth of July: there’s a lot of loud banging and kids screaming

Did you hear about the school shooting joke? Well, I won't tell you it's aimed at a younger audience.

Today my mom gave me a lecture on how to stay safe during school shootings and when my brother walked past my mom asked me a question "what do you think of going through kids heads during a school shooting " That's when my brother came back downstairs and said to me and my mom "bullets" we don't talk about this anymore

So I was at a funeral the other day and it was a school shooting mass funeral, and the lady beside me asked me, “ what do you think was going through their heads?” And I replied, “probably a bullet.” She was furious and said, “ How dare you you have no idea what those kids were probably going through!” And I replied, “well they were going through anything the bullet was going through them.”

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Eric's mom asked to his son why his bag is heavy and if it is because of books. Eric replied "No, magazines"

What do you think is going through kids heads during school shootings. Bullets

Cheap oil, no immigration and no school shootings.

Corona did what Trump promised

I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don’t understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, what’s so sad and she said “What do you think was running through these kid’s head before they died”. I replied “probably a bullet”, she gasped and said “do you have any idea how insensitive that is, what do you think is running through their parent’s heads”, I said " probably all the money their losing from this funeral".

POV there’s a school shooting American first time European yeah you American no not my first time

A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat he is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with "what do you mean I already did it" then the police ran back to the school to aprehend the other people he was planing it with the cops busted in through the doors which caused a smoke trap to go off which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles 4 per pole. Back to the station holding the kid being apprehended. the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said "Aww it pays to be lazy!"

somebody called the cops for a school shooting, what a snitch

Why don't parents get school shooting jokes? They're aimed at a younger audience.

Man 1: Hey I heard you survived a school shooting, what was it like? Man 2: People were screaming and running everywhere, I was only able to get a few of them.