Say jokes

Q. What do you say when your friend has an abortion?

A. May your baby rest in pieces.

I'm what they call a ✨️askhole✨️.

A person who will consistently ask for your advice and wisdom, but then proceed to do the exact opposite of what you say.

They say birds of a feather flock together, so I guess that’s why Kris and common sense haven’t met yet.

My proctologist used to be a photographer. He took x-rays and told me to bend over and say "cheese!"

What did Daveon say when he saw a spider? "I'm Dave-on with this!"

What's one thing that you can say about a train, but not your girlfriend?

What did the rapper say to the vegetable?

"Lettuce DROP some BEATS!"

What did the DJ say to the VEGETABLE?

"Lettuce turnip the beet!"

What did the rapper say to the microphone?

"You better DROP THE BEAT, or I'll drop YOU!"

What did the drunk emo say to the bartender?

Nothing, she was hung over.

You also have to learn to say no. For example: “Would you like a piece of cake?” - “No, I would like two.”

A blind man walks into a woman's bar and asks the person next to him if she would like to hear a blonde joke. The woman says, "Before you tell your joke, you should know the bartender is blonde and has a shotgun, the bouncer is blonde and has a baseball bat, the two playing music are blonde and have pistols. Do you still want to tell that joke, cowboy?" He thought for a second and said, "Not if I have to explain it five times."

What did the rapper say to his BROKEN PENCIL?

"You broke the beat!"

I’d say Leo is as sharp as a marble, but that would be an insult to marbles.

What did the rapper say to his microwave?

"Yo, heat it up, fam!"

What did Rapboat's mom say to Rapboat?

"Is it in yet?"

What did the rapper say to his broken refrigerator?

"Yo, chill!"

What does the suicidal person say on New Years?

"New year, no me."

Rapboat says he has a rap career. Wrap career more like, wrapping burgers at McDonald's.

What did the rapper say when he lost his voice?

"I guess I'll have to drop a SILENT TRACK!"