Save Jokes

Vegans:Save the Earth Normal People:Were trying to but you guys keep eating it

Nothing is funny about the Name who died an agonizing death, was mocked, spit on, and humiliated all because were sinners and God saved us so we could be free from the punishment of sin. Jesus is sinless and perfect and loving. How dare you.

A priest is struck by lightning and lays hurt on the ground.

When medical crew arrives he denies them saying "God will surely save me."

The medical team tries to help him but he keeps struggling and eventually dies.

Later in the afterlife, he screams at God, saying, "Why didn't you save me? Am I not dear to you?"

God answered, "B**** I sent you a f***ing ambulance and you denied it!"

👍 👍 👌 👌 👏 🙌 😮 🫢 🤔 💭 💡 🤣 😄 😃 😀 😊 😍 💘 🕳 What is the difference between paying $50.00 to received a anonymous blow job from a physically challenged gay white male who is also a sex worker at a glory hole and paying $175.00 to received a anonymous blow job from a able-bodied bisexual white female who is also a sex worker at a glory hole? If you give $50.00 to received a anonymous blow job from a physically challenged gay white male who is also a sex worker at a glory hole you are saving yourself $125.00 💸 😁

Therapy -Expensive -Years of hard work -Emotionaly draining -Tough to find

Screaming in the woods -Free -Immediate relief -Scares hunters enough to leave therefore saving innocent animals -Potential to make friends with people who are also screaming in the woods

If only Africa had more mosquito nets then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of aids

How do you save your wife from drowning?

Take your foot off of her neck.

A physicist, an engineer and a programmer were in a car driving over a steep alpine pass when the brakes failed. The car was getting faster and faster, they were struggling to get round the corners and once or twice only the feeble crash barrier saved them from crashing down the side of the mountain. They were sure they were all going to die, when suddenly they spotted an escape lane. They pulled into the escape lane, and came safely to a halt.

The physicist said, "We need to model the friction in the brake pads and the resultant temperature rise, see if we can work out why they failed."

The engineer said, "I think I've got a few spanners in the back. I'll take a look and see if I can work out what's wrong."

The programmer said, "Why don't we get going again and see if it's reproducible?"

Yesterday a 5-year-old dyslexic boy almost saved his mother from drowning, but he kept dialing 119...

GRAVEYARD SAVINGS: While leafing through our local newspaper, I noticed this classified ad: “For sale: one used tombstone. Splendid opportunity for a family named Dingle.”

There are 4 people on a airplane and the pilot has a heart attack and dies the plane is going down and there are also only 3 parachutes so the guy who knows how to cure cancer says I’m jumping I can save many lives the the 46 president joe Biden says I’m take ing the 2 one so there is only one left Donald trump says to the 7 year old girl I have lived a long life u an take the next one so the little girl says that’s ok the 46 president took my back pack.lol

One time, a cow saved my life. -- It was bovine intervention.

A man find out his wife is cheating on him with his best friend, so he hires a hitman to shoot his wife in the head, and his friend in the balls. The hitman charges $100 per bullet. The man agrees. Later, they set up, and the hitman looks through the scope and says “I can save you $100”

how did you get that? used your life savings

So... here's da scoop, alright... *licks KFC off lips* so, I was caught, having sex wit three 6 year olds (girls btw, just in case you guys get mad) and da judge told me I was getting da death penalty, you know what I mean?

I had a last resort to save myself though, you feel me? So I told da judge, I said to him, I said: "Yo honah, 6 + 6 + 6 = 18, you smell me?"

Needless to say, I was announced a fre-e-e-e-e-e-e man after dat, you feel me?

But then, the Predator Poachers nigckas just barged into the courtroom and they said: 4 + 4 + 5 = 13!

Alas, I'm writing this joke from jail, and judging by the look my prisonmate Tyrone is giving me, I'll be writing jokes from hell from now on.

Food makes are proudly presenting human flesh made foods donate your useless friends and family to us because we're saving lives T and C apply this is only in the best shops in your town or down the road or in your country 1 like = 1 family member donated cos we're saving lives😎😎