Said jokes

Someone cutting the cheese then farted.

Someone sees the cheese, and it smelled like crap (literally). He said, "Who cut the cheese?"

My sister said to kill myself, so now I’m in the hospital hoping to die.

So, I walked up to my grandma and I said, "What color would you be on a rainbow cupcake?" She just turned 61, ok, ok. So I'm like, "I got it, I got it, ok, ok." She's like: "Ok, what color?" I say: "Grey."

Look under...

Under where?

You just said underwear!

My sister said I'm stupid today, and she's the one who wrote this.

What did the Los Angeles Police do when George Floyd said that he could not breathe? They gave George Floyd two squirts of Zicam cold remedy inside his nose.

I asked my mom if I was adopted. She said no, "Why the fuck would I adopt you?" and I said "I'm gonna kill myself," and she also said, "Make sure you do it right this time."

Your mama so ugly, when the baby came out of her, the baby didn't cry. The baby said, "What the hell is this shit?" and walked out of the hospital.

My friend told me she had a good joke and it beat all mine. I said, "Haha, that is funny!"

I told my Mum, "Will you remember me in 6 minutes, 6 hours, 6 years?"

She said, "Yes."

"Knock knock."

I said, "My mum, who's there? You didn’t remember me!"

Your mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it said, "One at a time."

"Knock, knock?"

"Who's there?"

"Cow said."

"Cow said who?"

"Cow says moo you ding dong!"

Two Timetravers walk into a bar...

...the bartender then said, "Sorry, we don't serve Timetravers here."

The baby water bottle said to the mommy water bottle, "Mommy, I lost my teddy bear." The mommy water bottle said, "Why don't you RECAP on what you said?"

One day I told a kid what 2 x 12 was. He said he didn't know. I said let's go to my basement and figure it out. He is still in my basement trying to do the equation.

"Give me a cigarette," the condemned man said.

"I thought you quit," replied the guard.

"I did, but I don't think it matters anymore."

Your mom said my cum tastes like Captain Crunch, bitch.

Yesterday I got detention because I said to the emo kid, "Come hang with us."

My friend said, “there shouldn’t be discrimination, just black and normal.”

That was also the same guy who said [link to joke].

Why did Iran, ran?

Iran said, "I ran away!"