Run Over jokes
I hate sitting in traffic, I always get run over.
Bored? Run over an orphan with your car! What are they going to do, tell their nonexistent parents?
So, a blind man got run over by a car... a parked car.
Why did the blind kid drop his ice cream? He got run over by his mom.
My dog was hungry, so I let him loose outside while I filled his bowl.
I found out later that he was run over by a truck. It seemed to really hit the Spot.
My friend died by a truck, why can't I get run over?
Two tomatoes are walking on a road. Then a car runs over one of them, and the other says: "Hi, ketchup!"
Why did ItsFunneh go on the road? She so Draco looking at a car then the car runs over him, sad Draco.
Everyone always has a special person in their life someday, but I think yours got ran over by a bus.
I have no toes, so I put blood on my foot, and then my other foot got run over, so, ye.
A guy runs into a bar and yells, “Quick! How tall is a penguin?”
The bartender says, “Three feet tall.”
The guy says, “Oh my God! I just ran over a nun!”
I was sitting in traffic the other day.
Probably why I got run over.
A cat gets its tail run over, and its mother assured him it’ll be okay. “You just have to stay PAW-sitive!”
The mother was later killed in her sleep because her son hates puns. At the funeral, one of her daughters said, “You have CAT to be KITTEN me right MEOW!”
Guess who dies next.
So I was sitting on my couch, watching this homophobic TV show all about "straight and great". But then I remember, "Aren't I part of the LGBTQ?"
So I say, "Oh my God, let's throw it out the window because that would be a good idea!" But then it gets run over by 123,456,789 cars. It gave me a $150,000 fine. Guess I'm broke.
Who works at IHOP? A girl with one leg.
P1: Why did the chicken cross the road?
P2: To get to the other side DUH?!?
P1: No dumbass, it's to get run over because he has depression, a chronic illness, and his father left him for a good for nothing pimp that doesn’t even give a shit about how he feels. (Kinda like me).
P2: Holy shit are u ok? *Some random eavesdropping fucker dials 911 in a hurry*
What's the difference between a yellow line and a baby?
You can't run over a yellow line.
Me: Why did the bus drop his ice cream?
Sanity to live: I don't know?
Me: He was run over by Timmy!!!
Sanity to live? *dies*
Me: *At edge of bridge* Wow, sweet view.
Sanity to live: *resurrected*
Narrator: Sometimes a bridge is all you need...
(sponsored by jumping bridges)
Why did the boy get run over?
Sally was driving.
Why did the depressed person cross the road?
To get run over.
What did the Tin Man say when he got run over by a steamroller? -- "Curses! Foil again!"