Roast

Roast jokes

Stupid

You're so goddamn stupid, you thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.

Skinny

You're so skinny you never gain weight. You're so skinny you're a thin stick.

Yo mama

Yo mama sooooooo fucking fat, when she takes a step, she needs a 5-min break.

Duck

What happened when the duck crossed the road?

It crossed the road.

Insult

You're so skinny you're a thin stick.

You're so fat that when you got in Pacific Ocean, you became the Pacific Ocean.

You're so ugly you got stuff for free.

You're so nasty that when you eat spaghetti, you thought it was throw up.

You're so fat you're the fattest person on Earth.

You are so gay you kissed the boy last night.

Fat

You're so fat that when you stepped on a scale, it said, "To be continued..."

Mother

I know your name is baller cause I'm gonna put my baller into yo MOTHER HOLLER!

Mistake

If I missed something, I'll give it to you. If you taked it, you are a mistake.

Pain

You: You are such a flick pain.

Me: You are flick pain to my sight.

Friend

Friend: Do you think she likes me?

Me: Yah.

Friend: ReallyπŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€?

Me: Hell no.

Friend: πŸ˜₯πŸ˜“πŸ˜«πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­ You did not have to be so honest.

Bitch

Shut the fuck up, you fat bitch. You always like to roast others, but you can't walk up the stairs without passing out, you fat, stupid bitch. And I caught you breaking into someone's house just to steal a piece of candy, fat-ass bitch.

Zoo

My mum told me to take you to the zoo and throw you in the lake, but I couldn't find you.

Fat

You so fat you got thrown out the window, but the window threw you back inside.