Retail jokes
A blonde walks in and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde comes back the next day with brown hair and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde comes back the next day with brown hair and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde asks, "That's it, how'd you know I was a blonde?"
The seller replies, "Because that's a microwave."
When did the cheetah steal from the bakery?
On Black Friday!!!
9 people walked into Bunnings Warehouse.
2 people bought plants.
3 people bought shovels.
1 person yelled.
3 people left Bunnings Warehouse.
1 person was me. I guess those three people are fired! 💁♀️🤦♀️
Why did the chicken go to the mall?
To get new feathers!
I go to the shop and buy 2 pints of kimo.
So, a guy walked into the store and said to the worker: "Is this free?"
Then the worker said: "Nope, 'cause I'm on sale!"
I went to the store and I saw no oranges, and I went to ask the cashier:
"Cashier: Which one?"
What do Wal-Mart and Michael Jackson have in common?
They both have little boy's pants 1⁄2 off...
Why are there no Walmarts in Palestine?
There are Targets everywhere.
Why don't orphans go to Family Dollar? They don't have a family to go with 'em.
Next time at Walmart, I'm going to scan my wrist. They are basically barcodes.
What's a pirate's favorite shop?
Arrrrrrrrgos.
What do you say to your customer at a popsicle stand when he asks for the price?
Dollar a pop!
Get it?
You know that at Walmart they have backpacks next to the guns? Well, I thought that it was nice to see the bags next to the school supplies.
Yo mama is so dumb that she went to the eye doctor just to buy an iPhone.
Why don't terrorists like Walmart?
They prefer a Target.
Why do emos get discounts at every shop? Because they have barcodes on their wrists.
I meant to say, what’s an orphan's least favorite store to go to?
Family Dollar store.
Why does Tesco like midgets?
Every little helps.
"Stephen Hawking was talking about a cash register at Costco when he said I can’t stand these people. 😳😳😳😳😳😳 What did he saaaaaaayyyyyyy?"