Restaurant jokes
What do you call a Chinese assassin?
Chinese takeout.
You telling me Julius Caesar, who has been dead for well over 50 years, made this salad?
People should've recognized that Jared Fogle was a sick offender by one coded Subway sandwich; he normally claimed to kids he ate the sweet onion chicken teriyaki when it was the tuna sub.
Tuna sub was the message of the target to the kid since "tuna sub" put together makes "tunasub" and the truth comes when you spell it in reverse ("busanut")!
I'm 43 and my date is 19. A man rudely comes up to our table and calls me a pedophile. I told him to fuck off, this is our 10th anniversary.
Donald Trump has been banned from Panera.
A pancake and an egg walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve breakfast.”
Do you work at Subway? Because you turn my 6 inch into a footlong.
Yo mama so fat she made KFC go bankrupt.
What's a cannibal's favorite place?
A day care.
Q: What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant?
A: On The Border.
Today I ate out my girlfriend... Jeffrey Dahmer style.
What does the cannibal eat who comes late for dinner?
The cold shoulder.
The other day my wife said, "Take me someplace I have never been before!" I said, "Why don't you try the kitchen?"
I'll never forget my boss's last words: "We shall serve the best meat in our burgers!"
Q: How did Burger King get Dairy Quinn pregnant?
A: He forgot to wrap his whopper 🍆🍔.
What do you get when you throw a pile of dead babies into a fryer?
Kentucky Fried Children!
What's it called when you eat those same babies?
Finger Lickin' Good!
Welcome to Jimmy's orphanage and pizza shop, where today's loss is a sauce. How may I help you?
I had to share a table recently with a disabled man. When I asked him for the salt and pepper, he had to make two trips.
Men should pay for the first date, that’s why it’s called a (men)u.
Then women should do the dishes, that’s why they call it a dish wash(her).
What did the French Fry 🍟 say to the Hamburger 🍔?
I guess that’s a wrap!