🤔 why did a minister who is a christain nationalist and a bisexual man 👨 👩 👨 give a anonymous blowjobs to a ♿ physically handicapped gay 😍 men 👬 👨 under the handicapped stalls inside 🚹 🚹 the men's restrooms 🚻 😴 at a rest area 😴 he wanted to 😋 eat footlong hotdogs 🌭 🌭 for lunch at the rest area but he wanted a sample first (taster) 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭
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I almost got run over by a car For the rest of the day I was Taking the backseat as I was wheely Tried
Today i went to get a sub and they asked me if i wanted all vegetables.. I said no, leave some for the rest of the customers.
You have five seconds to kill me 1.. 2... 3... 4- thank you i can rest now- WAIT HOW AM I TALKING??????????????????????
If your parachute doesn't work, don't worry. You have the rest of your life to figure it out.
My sis came up to me and said " mom told me to take the trash out for the rest of the year " "so uhh you free tomorow?" 😂
Buy a man an airplane ticket, he will fly once. Throw a man off an airplane and he will fly for the rest of his life.” -Sun Tzu
What's the difference between me and the rest of America?
I love 1 and hate the other.
How many thots have I bullied? 3. The rest is dead.
stephen hawking rest in pc world
one day, little Sally hears the phone ringing. she picks it up "Hello, this is daddy, Sally. Is your mom nearby." Sally says, "No, shes upstairs with Uncle john" "Uncle john? i don't know an Uncle John." "no, no, no, you must be mistaken, daddy" "no i'm sure there's no one named Uncle John in our family." "Okay, but why did you call?" Says Sally. "Ummm no reason, just tell mommy that daddy's pulling into the driveway right now." "Okay daddy!"
*long pause*
"Okay daddy! I did it!' "Great job Sally! What did she says?"
"Mommy said OH FU.. and then she ran around with no clothes on and tripped on the carpet and hit her head on the bookshelf. shes now resting it looks like... then Uncle John screams and jumps out the window into the swimming pool, but of course we took all the water out this winter..."
then dad replies "Swimming pool? we dont have a...is this 468-1843?"
I watched the series of unfortanet events 4 times all the shows 4 times, : me -crying - I am trying to finish the rest then my brother comes in and says it is PG, ( parent guidens) after that.... My brother called me a bAby then he pushed me off my bed.😭
Hitler walks into his meeting room, turns to his trusted staff, and says, “I want you to organize the execution of 10,000 Jews and one kitten.”
Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Goering pipes up. “Mein Fuhrer, why do you want to kill a kitten?”
Hitler smiles and turns to the rest of the table. “You see, no one cares about the Jews.”
Shit if somebody invades America the Crips and the Bloods are gonna call a truce so that they can get the big toys out and call Geneva achievement. White women would ride into battle riding lions, tigers, and bears while claymore-strapped rhumbas swept the streets. There's a reason Putin keeps threatening to boom boom us with the boom booms and make you see x-rays before you go go. We have freaking cannibals still. Hell, we have more guns than people. Dodging bullets have become a rite of passage. Just look at how we raise our kids on caffeine and M16s playing Call of Duty. Then we send them into the warzone known as the American public education system with no weapons. No means to protect themselves other than with their fists. Here Timmy, fight off the bullets with your bare fist and hope you can zig-zag. Hell, the quiet kids in this country start dropping bodies just cause you teased them. The fuck you think's gonna happen when Timmy can't get his damn chicken nuggets and you took his internet out? Hell the gangs in America would no longer make their money off the drugs illegally. They'd be our medics and taking bets on kill shots. Don't even get me started on the unhinged millennials the moment they can't get their mood stabilizers. War crimes would become an art form and we'd run around like we playing Pokemon. GOTTA CATCH 'EM ALL! Americans would turn war crimes into an extreme sport while the military stands back and records it just so they can show the rest of the world the example of why not to fuck with us. Shit Geneva Convention would turn into a to-do list on every American household fridge. We take that shit so seriously we'd have comedy central sending Kevin Hart to tell us rules for engagement. Racism in America would be single-handedly by ended as Billy Bob and Tyrone high five because they think they just unlocked the super secret duck hunt level with foreign paratroopers. Shit somebody please threaten us with a good time. Invade the united states. Let us show you why the first color in our flag is red.
A black man walked into a bar. Other guy invited him over for a drink. They spent the rest of the night drinking and having a good time.
