Reproduction jokes
Abortion is beautiful. I wish we could all be aborted.
Q: What do you call a blonde with only two brain cells?
A: Pregnant.
I was camping with my buddy, and there was a fire. We were roasting marshmallows, and there was a vine. I tripped on it and went penis first into the fire, and I said, "Well, there goes your children, stupid ass!"
Q: What type of mother gives their daughter sperm? A: A furry mother.
I'm actually against abortion.
Just go to the car wash and tell 'em you ate too much red pasta!
My superpower is that I can create life.
Why do orphans enjoy orgasms?
What did one sperm say to the other while swimming side by side?
One turns to the other and asks, "How much further to the fallopian tubes?"
The other says, "I’m not sure, we just passed the esophagus."
It used to be "My Body, My Choice" until Trump came to power. Now it's "Your Body, My Choice."
How do planets have a baby?
They have spasex.
What happens when an angel and nun "have some fun and forget pills"?
The nun gets pregNUNt.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to do it in the water.
Jack slipped, and the condom ripped; now they have a daughter.
Girl: What is abortion?
Man: Ask your brother.
Girl: But I don't have a brother!
Man: Exactly!
If a pregnant woman is under water, isn't she technically a submarine?
Scientists have proven that there are two things in the air that have been known to cause women to get pregnant: their legs.
How do you sex?
With penis!
Jajajajja funny joke epic laugh. I have been detained, please help!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.
Jack got high, touched Jill's thigh, and said, "I know you wanna."
But silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a kid.
What's the difference between a baby and a sandwich?
I don't f**k a sandwich before I eat it.
If two eagles make a baby and two sparrows make a baby, what makes no baby?
Two swallows.
Jack and Jill went up a hill to do it in the water.
Jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a daughter.