Religion jokes
Why do Roman Catholics always call their minister father?
because Roman Catholic men between 18-29 years old received a free anonymous blowjob inside the confessional booth at the glory hole.
What to gift a child molester who already has everything? A bigger county with more believers.
Do you know how to make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
The bird was trying to cross the road because there was a church, but instead, the birds chirp chirp chirp, "Let's go to church!"
What is the difference between whores and nuns?
Nuns usually discover their own chosen vocation. Whores usually have their vocation chosen by pimps.
Why does an orphan have to go to church? Because that's the only way he can pray for a father.
What do a politician and a minister have in common?
Both of them will tell you anything to get money from you.
What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? A prostitute won't tell you that it is more blessed to give than it is to receive.
What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? You don't get something in return if you give money to a church.
What is the difference between giving money to a church and giving money to the IRS?
If you stop giving money to a church, you won't go to prison.
What do the initials BIBLE stand for?
Bull In Book Lacking Evidence
Why did the Catholic priest suck dick at a glory hole?
Because someone asked him what he would do for a Klondike bar.
How do you trick a Catholic priest into using the glory hole at an adult bookstore? Tell him it is a confessional booth.
What does a glory hole and a confessional booth have in common?
A blowjob is anonymous.
What do you call a devil texting you? Travelers on the way. 😈🤣
What did the teacher say to the fat Turkish kid that always ate in his class?
"You could do with Ramadan lasting all year, couldn't you?"
Heterosexual sodomy is like religion. If you were forced to accept it when you were younger, you probably would not like it when you become an adult.
In what ways do nuns and hoes have something in common?
They both worship on their knees. They are both creatures of habit. They both take vows of poverty and obedience. Once chosen, neither can leave the life. They both swallow their hosts.
I'm not sure how I'm going to get to Heaven.
God had not built a ramp yet... or an escalator.
What is white, black, and red and can't fit through a revolving door?
A nun with a spear through her head!