Red jokes
A black dude hits up a trap house for some crack and Hennessy, flashing his grill and boasting 'bout his gangsta life. The dealer snarls, "Pay up, fool. Or face the pipe!" He shrugs, "I'm broke, n***a." Suddenly, the dealer's ripped enforcer yanks him down, cuffs his hands with zip ties, shoves a vibrating dildo gag down his throat, slaps his ass red with a spiked paddle, then rams his throbbing monster cock into that tight hole, pounding savagely while choking him with a chain collar, flooding his guts with hot cum as he moans, "That's your high, bitch. Addicted yet?"
Roses are red, just like your lips.
Mountains are big, just like your tits.
Roses are red, I hate snitches, You talk a lot of game for a guy with 3 inches.
Serial killers be like: "Blood is red, veins are blue, next one is YOU."
What do you call two redheads on Mars?
Locals.
Memes
Why did an old man fall in a well? Because he couldn’t see that well!
Why did the actor fall through the floorboards? They were going through a stage!
Why did a scarecrow win a Nobel prize? He was outstanding in his field!
Why are peppers the best at archery? Because they habanero!
What did the duck say after she bought chapstick? Put it on my bill!
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
What did the three-legged dog say when he walked into a saloon? “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw!”
How do you tell the difference between a bull and a cow? It is either one or the udder!
What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint!
What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is very heavy, the other is a little lighter!
Be careful, everybody, I have a red dot on my forehead, so I can record everybody!
Roses are red... Violets are blue... I feel like I'm gonna get raped next to you.
Roses are red, the Jews are a cult.
I've practiced Metzitzah b'peh on adults.
What is red, green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs?
...A girl scout that got hit by a car.
Charli tries to roast me: Roses are red, violets are blue, and you look like poo.
Me: You must have been born on the highway because that's where most accidents happen.
What’s black, white, and red all over?
An ethnic orgy.
How do you paint a wall red?
You shoot a baby with a .50 cal.
Roses are red, Lemons are sour; Lift your skirt up and give me an hour.
One day, two friends found a treasure map. So they decided to try to find the treasure.
After several hours they found the treasure. It was a suit that gives the person wearing it super strength. One of the friends wore the suit and hugged the other friend. They were both red.
Blood is red.
Bruises are blue. I forget the rest... um, I hate you...?
Roses are red, your penis is blue, the bed sheet has turned a different color, too.
If you are talking to an Indian and notice a red dot appear on their forehead, be careful of what you said... They are recording it down... Careful... (no offense) pure joke.
How do you blow up an Indian? Press the red dot in the middle of their forehead!
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Pickup line for gay people:
Roses are red, Antarctica is in the south, Get on your knees, And open your mouth.