Reaction

Reaction jokes

When you suffer from depression and somebody tells you to just cheer up-- Me: My goodness, what an idea! Why didn't I think of this before?

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  • You tell an orphan joke to an orphan. You start laughing, they start crying. They say they are going to tell their mom. Then you start laughing harder.

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  • What do teen mothers and their unborn babies have in common?

    They're both thinking "Oh my God, my mom's gonna kill me!"

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  • My sister thinks she's sooooo smart. She said that the only food that makes you cry is onions, therefore I threw a coconut at her.

    Bully: Oh, look at your shoes, look at your pants, look at your shirt, ay, ay, ay.

    Me: Ding, ding, sing, oh, did you hear that? It's the elevator 'cause you're not on my level.

    Bully: u_u ......

    Crowd: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh

    Ahem... if somebody you don't like, or somebody random just calls you in general,

    answer the phone with this:

    "Hello, thank you for choosing Mama's Pizzeria/Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce, how may I help you?"

    or

    "Hello, this is David's Orphanage, you make them, we take them, how may I help you?"

    Some people's reactions are priceless, and then they wonder about your mental health.

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  • I know why nobody likes my comments, because they got no sense of humor. That's why they dislike it. Now I know depression is a joke, a joke that never gets a laugh. =[ WHYYYY NO ONE LAUGH AT MY JOKES?

    Brother: I bought my brother a trampoline today, the ungrateful fuck just sat in his wheelchair and cried.

    When I was 14, my mum caught me wanking, and she slapped me across the face. A couple weeks later, my dad caught me having a beer, and he made me drink 40 beers. I just thought, "Well, I'm glad he didn't catch me wanking."

    People say killing two birds with one stone is a good thing, but when I did it, people just looked horrified.

    Kris

    Damn this shit!

    Megan Thee Stallion: What!

    Kris: My mother is a fucker!

    The whole world:

    OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!