Rape jokes

So... here's da scoop, alright... *licks KFC off lips* so, I was caught having sex wit three 6 year olds (girls btw, just in case you guys get mad) and da judge told me I was getting da death penalty, you know what I mean?

I had a last resort to save myself though, you feel me? So I told da judge, I said to him, I said: "Yo honah, 6 + 6 + 6 = 18, you smell me?"

Needless to say, I was announced a fre-e-e-e-e-e-e man after dat, you feel me?

But then, the Predator Poachers nigckas just barged into the courtroom and they said: 4 + 4 + 5 = 13!

Alas, I'm writing this joke from jail, and judging by the look my prisonmate Tyrone is giving me, I'll be writing jokes from hell from now on.

I was raped by mimes once. They did unspeakable things to me.

Hey guys. I just wanted to say, while I think some rape jokes can be funny, not one of these are. In fact, I find them pretty horrifying.

I was raped when I was fourteen (about six years ago), and I have made one rape joke in my entire life when, last year, I said "I don't fuck with rapists, I just get fucked by them." I thought it was funny. No one else did, and they were probably right in that.

My point is this: rape jokes CAN be funny when they are used by victims as a way of coping with trauma. They CANNOT be funny when they are made about raping someone else. Even if there is a difference between joking about raping someone and raping someone, it is absolutely disgusting to think such a horrific crime is funny, and I am sure at least some of the posters on this page have already crossed the line into committing rape.

Great material for social scientific research, though, gentlemen. Really well done.

I told the judge I thought she was unconscious before she woke up crying. The judge asked: "Why didn't you drug her again so she would forget?"

I must have raped a woman in a skip. She said she felt rubbish.

Men built civilisations. Men went to the moon. Men invented the modern comforts of today’s society.

Women did none of those. They are useless, only fit to be baby making machines.

I once got raped. I was asking for it though.

We shouldn't joke about rape, because rape is no laughing matter...

Unless you're being raped by a clown.

What can you say to make a rape victim feel better?

"It will be over soon."

Me being raped is like my birth certificate; it doesn't expire.

If I was a raped victim, would silence be the best medicine?

My fitness guru said that if I got raped, it would help me in future marathons.

"Rape[is] the only sign of world peace in this life."

Why did a woman believe she was a target? She had a price tag without any value to it.

A Souls fan raped me. He said, "Try finger, but hole."

I think I banged a Chinese celebrity...

She kept screaming “I’m Wei Tu Yung” like I was supposed to know the name.

How can you tell when a female was raped? She crossed herself out.

An orphan girl wanted a family so she was raped until pregnant. Problem solved.

Dear doctor,

I've heard it's a good sign when women scream your first name during sex, but recently women have been screaming my full name. It's weird, I feel like I'm famous. Can you tell me what this means?

Yours Truly, Ray Palp

Why did the blind woman get raped?

Because she didn't know she was wearing see-through clothes.