Punchline jokes
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
Why are emo jokes so infamous?
They cut deep.
What do you call a nose without a body? -- Nobody knows.
What makes a joke a dad joke?
I don't know. I don't even have one as an example.
What do you call a girl with an hourglass figure? -- A waist of time.
Sign on my attorney's office wall: "You can't have manslaughter without laughter."
Knock knock.
Who's there?
9/11.
9/11 who?
You said that you would never forget!
What do you call a prostitute with a major in math?
The thot that counts.
I'm funny but sad, I submit jokes you'll love. Look for my name in jokes you've read. Anyway.
What did the man with no hands get for his birthday? Gloves. Just kidding, he didn't have the chance to open the gifts.
What do you call a joke without a punchline?
Why do self-harmers "draw" on their arms?
Because everything they do is in vein.
Punchline: "Vain" sounds similar to "Vein".
What's the difference between an asshole and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?
Nothing, you've told her twice.
I would tell you a milk joke, but it's whey too cheesy!
Hey, wanna hear an abortion joke? Never mind, I can't deliver it.
Student: 503 bricks are on a plane. 1 falls off. How many are left?
Teacher: 502.
Student: How do you put an elephant in a fridge?
Teacher: No, you can't fit an elephant in a fridge!!
Student: Just open door, put elephant in, close door.
Student: How do you put a giraffe in the fridge?
Teacher: open door, put giraffe in, close door
Student: No! Open door, take elephant out, put giraffe in, close door.
Student: The Lion King is having a B-day party. All the animals are there, except one. Which one?
Teacher: let me guess the lion?
Student: No! The giraffe because He's in a fridge.
Teacher: WOW!
Student: Sally has to get across a large river home to many alligators. They are very dangerous, but Sally swims across safely. How?
Teacher: Sally stepped on the alligators mouth?
Student: The gators are at the party.
Student: But Sally dies anyway. Why?
Teacher: She drowned?!
Student: No! She got hit in the head by a flying brick.
Who’s there?
To.
To who?
No, “to whom.”
I'm trying to come up with a set-up for an amputee joke, but I'm stumped.
What has an N, an I, two Gs, an E, and an R?
Ginger!
If you are going to make fun of someone, make fun of orphans. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
Double whammy.
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer, it never gets old.