President jokes
Why was going through JFK's head when he was getting assassinated? A bullet.
Biden
Hillary for president.
The last thing that went through Abe Lincoln's head was a bullet.
Donald Trump announced he will run for prez today. His hair will on Friday.
Biden: Shut up, Trump, disrespectful!
President: You are the one with the inappropriate hair touching, bro. 😎😎😎😎😎😎
Biden: -laughs hard because sloppy Joe can't do anything.
What's the difference between Obama and Trump?
Obama was a president and Trump was a whiny bitch!
Why does Trump play Minecraft?
'Cause he can build walls.
Donald Trump took the bullet better than Joe Biden took the stairs.
What do you call a bullet head?
JFK.
Why does Trump "not" wear glasses? Because he's got 20/20 vision!
Vote Biden or Trump, I like neither, but I want to know what the world would say. (Don't judge other people.)
What is orange and will soon be wearing prison orange? Trump.
Why does Trump always ensure he has a second pair of pants with him every weekend?
In case he gets a hole in one.
My favorite sex position is the JFK:
I splatter all over her as she screams and tries to get out of the car.
Hey any riding with Biden fans out there?
I ran out of gas and could really use a ride so if one of ya'll can call me and pick me up that'd be great and I can't get gas because I only have 20 bucks which is like 1-5 and a half, help me please.
Did you hear they just took Biden to the hospital?
No, what happened?
He couldn’t stop pootin!
Trump, just why?
Why is Donald Trump under so much stress?
Because he signed up to be on an album where somebody says "no love for the rich" on it.
What does Donald Trump say when he declares war? Nuke them.
What does a pervert say when he declares war? Nude them.