Pregnant

Pregnant Jokes

Scientists have proven that there are two things in the air that have been known to cause women to get pregnant: their legs.

Remember back in the day when your TV wouldn't work so you'd bang it a few times?

I tried that with my dishwasher, but unfortunately, she ended up pregnant...

One way to not pick up girl is to say, “are you an American school because I wanna shoot kids into you.” I tried it on a girl and she is now terrified to come near me.

How was I supposed to know she was already pregnant?

When your girlfriend has been vomiting for 2 weeks and you find out she’s not pregnant.

Bf-*yes I knew it was a prank*

She has cancer.

Wife: I will leave you if you call me fat again. Husband: Wait dear.. Don’t do it for the sake of our kid! Wife: Kid? Husband: Yeah, aren’t you pregnant?

Son: Dad, I think I got a girl pregnant.

Dad: Well, is she already part of the family?

Son: Yes, why?

Dad: Then there’s no need to be worried.