Pregnant

Pregnant jokes

Emo

If a pregnant emo kills herself, is that murder-suicide or just abortion?

Prostitution

What is an example of poor management? A prostitute getting pregnant.

What does a burnt pizza, cold beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?

Someone didn’t pull it out in time.

I told the last person I slept with I was pregnant. He freaked the fuck out but calmed down after he realized it was April Fools'.

The look on my cousin's face was hilarious.

My girlfriend really wants me to get her pregnant so she would have a father figure in her life for once.

Scientists have proven that there are two things in the air that have been known to cause women to get pregnant: their legs.

Yo mama is such a slut, she could get slapped by a pack of hot dogs and get pregnant.

Remember back in the day when your TV wouldn't work so you'd bang it a few times?

I tried that with my dishwasher, but unfortunately, she ended up pregnant...

One way to not pick up a girl is to say, “Are you an American school because I wanna shoot kids into you?” I tried it on a girl, and she is now terrified to come near me.

How was I supposed to know she was already pregnant?

When your girlfriend has been vomiting for 2 weeks and you find out she’s not pregnant.

Bf-*yes I knew it was a prank*

She has cancer.