Pregnant jokes
What’s something you can say during a pregnancy test and during a sporting event?
"We’ve got a runner!"
My mom was 19 when she was pregnant with me, My mom was 39 when she was pregnant by me!!!
While fucking, my sister said, "Brother, you are so naughty! You fucked our elder aunt every day in the absence of my uncle and cousins and made her pregnant!" Little did she know, I fucked our mother every day in the absence of her, my father, and my elder brother and made my mom pregnant as well!
What’s the best part about having sex with a pregnant woman?
You can have sex and a blow job at the same time.
When a woman is something weeks or months pregnant and her stomach has a visible bump, everyone rubs her tummy, but no one tickles the husband's balls and says, "Good job, buddy!"
If a pregnant emo kills herself, is it murder-suicide?
The president of the USA is so damn stupid. His mother must have taken Tylenol while she was pregnant with him, or something.
If a pregnant emo kills herself, is that murder-suicide or just abortion?
What is an example of poor management? A prostitute getting pregnant.
What does a burnt pizza, cold beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?
Someone didn’t pull it out in time.
How do you get a slag from Dundee pregnant?
Spunk in the gutter and let the flies do the work...
How do you know if a Black woman is pregnant?
Stick a chicken wing up there.
I told the last person I slept with I was pregnant. He freaked the fuck out but calmed down after he realized it was April Fools'.
The look on my cousin's face was hilarious.
Why isn't there a pregnant Barbie doll?
Ken came in another box.
What’s the best part of having sex with a pregnant woman?
You can have sex and a blow job at the same time.
What does a pregnant slave and a payless sale have in common?
Buy one, get one free.
My girlfriend really wants me to get her pregnant so she would have a father figure in her life for once.
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
Help! I got my brother pregnant.
Scientists have proven that there are two things in the air that have been known to cause women to get pregnant: their legs.